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The Friday Poem: ‘Constructive Criticism’ by Michael Hall

It’s Phantom Billstickers National Poetry Day! All week this week we’ve presented new verse on the delicate subject of fucking; today, we present a poem of much greater significance and importance, by Michael Hall of Dunedin.

 

Constructive Criticism

 

Awww come on ref

The guy’s clearly offside

 

Aww come on ref

That’s not a penalty

 

Aww come on,

For fuck’s sake, ref

 

That was forward

It was right in front of you

 

Ref, you couldn’t even officate

A blade of grass

 

Ref, my 6 year old can ref

Better than you

 

Why don’t you run off

And marry your whistle, ref

 

You’re a joke, ref

You’re embarrassing yourself

 

Ref, you can stick that whistle

Up your big fat hairy arse

 

Michael Hall, 2018


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