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MKR Episode 26: Kia Kaha Hippy Darlings

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the comfortable Sudden Death couch

The Corporate Dads were safe as hell after their major pizza hustle of the last ep, and the three remaining teams were left fighting for a place in the coveted MKRNZ semifinals. Jessie and Ricki were on the Sudden Death loser couch, and the rest of the teams were left to make a romantic date night meal. “Straight away, we’re thinking meat,” said the Hippies. Easy on! Heather and Aaron went for oysters (two ways), crooner Aaron was clearly in the romance zone. Sensual Gareth agreed with their choice, “I’m all about shellfish for romance.” Dai and Dal were making romantic duck. It was a hot hot night in the kitchen for sure.

Deconstructed snowman peen

Deconstructed snowman peen

Heather got to work making caviar like the late great scientist Steve once did. The Hippies were ramping up their eye fillet with nettles and bone marrow butter. Nothing like a romantic evening of marrow. Dal burnt herself badly on a pan, leading to a cameo from the Casanova of the kitchen – the rare MKRNZ medic. With one hand wrapped in a glove and sealed with fancy blue chef tape, Dal soldiered on making a weird semi-rude looking carrot arrangement on her plate. “I’ll do it!” said Dai, piously taking over. The time ran out, and Heather and Aaron realised they had left one oyster sitting next to the plate. Gareth might not get his full aphrodisiac fill. Dai and Dal won, heading straight into the semifinals with their crispy skin duck (100% certain some of the crispy skin was Dal’s).

my precious (cakes)

my precious (cakes)

The remaining romancers were left with a new mystery box challenge, they would be using a sexy product that nets $20 billion a year. “Corned beef?” said hilarious Aaron. It was chocolate. The Hippies got to work doing a rich chocolate tart, I could tell by Neena’s face she was lamenting the lack of cacao in the storeroom. Heather and Aaron were making a chocolate cake, Aaron immediately started vacuum packing slices of melon for some reason. The tart wasn’t setting, the cakes were wobbly – everything was very chocolatey, and very tense. “Don’t even try and push me!” Heather snapped at Aaron, “I want to be plating girl!” Aaron snapped back. Heather was sweating, and talking to herself like Smeagol in the cave. The Hippies weren’t much better, their disastrous tart was never going to set. They sloshed it out of the tin and bunged all of the deconstructed ingredients on the plate. It looked, absolutely crazy. “My guts are sitting in my throat” said Heather. So were mine.

moving

moving

When plating up, Heather’s cake collapsed, so Aaron grabbed and threw it across the bench “Piri Weepu style.” They replaced it with a mini practice cake, just like Piri Weepu would have. The Hippies’ deconstructed tart was obviously the loser on the night, making way for one of the biggest MKRNZ emotional breakdowns yet. Through tears, Belinda spoke of wanting to empower women to make a difference, and how being a foodie was just like having a heart beat. “Kia kaha darling,” Neena whispered to her (also through tears). It was highly emotional. I honestly believe that should be the name of their MKRNZ-inspired women’s movement. Anyway, I was weeping, Neena was weeping, Belinda was weeping, even Ben might have been weeping. Like all good dates, it’s always best to end the night with a good cry.

Moral of the story: Kia Kaha darling. Oh, that’s me misty-eyed again. I’ve been watching this show for too long.

Watch My Kitchen Rules on TVNZ Ondemand here

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