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RecapsNovember 13, 2014

The Tribe Has Spoken: Survivor San Juan Del Sur Episode 7

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Survivor San Juan Del Sur Power Rankings: Episode 7

11) Julie Rocker Quits the Game
As someone who was cursed from birth in terms of Survivor eligibility via living in New Zealand and being too young to have potentially competed with dirty old Clarke Gayford on Treasure Island – I hate people who quit Survivor. Julie is the worst in this season now. Quitting, imho, is unforgivable.

Especially weird because this seems like it was a pretty ‘easy’ season in terms of the elements. It seems like it’s only rained once. Plus, Julie was on the tribe that pigged and received all the comforts (a hammock) plus she got that kebab, plus the merge feast was like a day previous!

What was super annoying, though, was the fact that Jeff hardly gave Julie any shit about it! Usually when someone is medivac’d or quits he reads them the bloody Riot Act, but here he was almost encouraging her to quit. It was basically as follows:

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Eff you Julie Rocker. Eff you forever.

10) Jeremy Innovating the Game Again

compression shorts

Compression shorts under normal togs is the sickest shit I’ve ever seen!

Makes sense that he’d be rocking such athletic apparel – given he used to play semi-pro arena football. According to this book I found on Google Books after a exhaustive deep dive, he was the best athlete on the team!


9) Wesley’s Boots


Wesley carries on the proud tradition of Survivors wearing these ludicrous boots as a kind of signifier that they’re a ‘good ole boy’. Legend.

8) Twinnies 2.0 aka Fear of a Black Planet

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I am 100% in love with the Jeremy/Natalie alliance. Such a sick alliance.

7) Josh and Reed trying to hold back a smile when Julie quit and therefore weakened the enemy alliance

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6) Jeremy’s ‘stickin’ with this weird stick chewing thing
Honestly an incredibly intimidating look. He looks like he should be in The Wire!

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“All in the game, yo. All in the game.” – Jeremy Collins after murdering ~3 Survivors.

5) Two Buffs

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A lot of fashion innovation/game-changing in this season. Eg Julie and Jaclyn seemingly splitting their buffs in two!

4) Another Freaky as Shit Idol
Yup there’s a new individual immunity idol and yup it’s freaky as shit. Bonus points for the centrepiece on this beauty running the risk of getting sued by the artist/Gorilla formerly known as 2D.

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3) Sad Keith

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2) Missy

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I don’t like Missy very much. But I’m really really glad she’s on that bloody island. Week by week she’s developing into an excellent antagonist. Like, super cold-blooded.

Missy owned this episode for me. The speech she gave Baylor where she was like “shut the f*** up and do what I say and smile and stab Josh right through the goddamn heart” was one of the sickest speeches I’ve ever seen on Survivor. Ice cold. I loved it. Missy is like the anti-Tami Taylor.

1) Josh vs Jeremy
On a season that is severely limited in terms of elite gameplay, it’s extremely lucky that the two soundest players are almost diametrically opposed in terms of their strategy. Let us all pray that Jeremy and Josh live on for at least a few more weeks so they can continue to duke it out. I like Jeremy and Josh and honestly thank god for them because they are carrying this season.

Actual Power Rankings
Not many changes here except that Julie’s quit and Jon’s defection has put Josh in pole position as potential winner for me. I’m dropping Reed down also because it’s too weird how he isn’t getting any screen time at all.

  1. Josh
  2. Jeremy
  3. Natalie
  4. Baylor
  5. Keith
  6. Missy
  7. Jon
  8. Jaclyn
  9. Wes
  10. Alec
  11. Reed

I reckon Reed’s going real soon. There’s no way these people are dumb enough to let Josh and Reed survive together much longer and the fact that Josh is getting 100% of the screen time is fairly telling. I also reckon Baylor’s gonna pull a Sierra and vote out her mom, Missy at some stage. I also predict with certainty that it will continue being unbelievable cute every time Keith calls Wes “Wesley”.

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