From carpeted baths to BYO toilets, our rental market has it all.

Auckland designer Richard Parry has been cataloguing curiosities within the local rental market in a long-running segment on his Instagram page called Crap Rentals. As a part of Rent Week, Parry has given The Spinoff the keys to his illustrious archive of shocking, uneasy, hilarious and ridiculous rental properties advertised across Aotearoa.

Today, we look at the 10 most haunting bathrooms for rent across the motu.

10) Redrum

The perfect pairing to a blood red bedroom that loves you to the moon and bac.

9) N*Sink

Why wash your hands in the sink when you can simply wash your hands in the washing machine?

8) Never shower alone

Ever.

7) Carpet bath

I actually kinda love this. No notes.

6) Peekaboo

“Tell Cersei, I want her to know it was me.” – this shower head.

5) Need for speed

Why simply go to the toilet when you could instead hurtle through hyperspace?

4) Indoor/outdoor flow

Could that be onion weed growing through the floor? Dinner and a show.

3) Ghost toilet

Boo!

2) Bike path < Bike bath

With a bit of Kiwi ingenuity, you too can create your own Peloton anywhere in the home.

1) World’s worst ensuite

So much to unpack and so little space to do it in. The two tiles on the carpet, the papered over windows (or truly spectacular sunset – who can say?), the enormous black Celebrity Treasure Island monolith leaning against the wall. Folks: that’s a bed. Just let that sink in.