After watching CNN’s three hour, 11 candidate Republican debate yesterday, Duncan Greive assesses the general vibe of each candidate, with help from Alex Casey on speech bubbles
Rand Paul: Guy who woke up in his car – again.
Mike Huckabee: Crew member in charge of laughing at leader’s jokes / Will dance for VP selection
Marco Rubio: Best Supporting Actor Academy Award Nominee for playing a President
Ted Cruz: Funeral Preacher. Doesn’t know the name of the deceased.
Ben Carson: Guy you have a ‘save me’ signal for, in case you get stuck talking to them at a party.
Donald Trump: DONALD TRUMP
Jeb Bush: Exasperated Fourth Form Dean
Scott Walker: Inherited his Dad’s SME manufacturing firm and suit. Neither fits.
Carly Fiorina: Reconditioned Second Generation Synth
John Kasich: Car boot lawyer
Chris Christie: Bargain store frontman (above Mad Butcher, below Adrienne and John from Magness Benrow)