‘Even if I discovered absolutely no attraction to the person, there was never a situation where someone turned out to be horrible.’
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Age: 43
Gender: Genderqueer
Sexuality: Repro-conditional fraysexual
Ethnicity: Anglophonic cosmopolitan
Religion: None
Occupation: Musician/music teacher
My living location is: West Coast
The apps I’m on: Previously tried Bumble when living in Wellington, but even there did not find anyone willing to initiate anything with me.
I’m looking for: I’m not really looking for anything specific. I would like the chance to build more intimate connections with people that give me good feelings. Overall, I accept people as they present themselves, and simply react to however I feel about them.
Mostly I’m finding: Loneliness
My last serious relationship was: I don’t think I’ve ever had a serious relationship where the other person involved would even agree it was a “relationship”
The worst date I ever had: I’ve never had a bad date. Even if I discovered absolutely no attraction to the person, there was never a situation where someone turned out to be horrible.
The best date I ever had: I don’t think I could rank any of them as the best, without feeling a sense of disloyalty to many others! The good ones were good for many different reasons, and it has simply never occurred to me to try and position any one of those reasons above the others, or to force any of those I love to compete in my mind.
The most regrettable thing I ever did on a date: No regrets. I just wish there had been many more.
The best thing a date ever did for me: Fill me with a sense of joy that left me smiling all night.
The biggest red flag I’ve seen on a date: Someone who worked for a notoriously evil property management company, and saw nothing at all unethical about it.
On a date I usually wear: Clothes.
I have sex when: someone else is willing to initiate the first move (subtle hints definitely not counting as a move).
I wish dating was: Cheaper.
This is what I think about who pays on dates: If you’ve offered something to someone, you don’t then make them pay for it. Whatever I give is given freely. Paying for a date does not impose any obligation whatsoever onto the other person.
Three words that describe my dream date: Vibrating in harmony.
My dating advice is: Don’t take my advice on dating!
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