From a Porn Revolution to the story behind Hairy Maclary, catch up on the gems you might have missed this year.
Chris & Eli’s Porn Revolution: What’s the deal with OnlyFans?
It’s the biggest thing in porn right now, so what’s the deal with OnlyFans in Aotearoa? Chris and Eli meet three different people who share the highs and lows of being creators on the platform. (Contains sexual themes.)
Alice Snedden’s Bad News: Is New Zealand’s rugby culture still toxic?
What is rugby actually doing to be better? Alice meets with bosses, players and experts and encounters a culture of silence that nearly shuts the episode down entirely.
Hair Now: Roxie takes her monobrow into the modelling world
Roxie is growing out her monobrow and abandoning her hair straightener. After being bullied as a child for being hairy, now her body hair can be a commodity – but there is still a social cost.
Heath Davis was a cult hero of New Zealand cricket in the 1990s thanks to his unpredictable performances and larger-than-life personality. Off the field, however, it was a different story – one that hasn’t been told until now.
Lynley Dodd: Writing the Pictures, Painting the Words
In 1983, a little dog called Hairy Maclary trotted into our lives, and children’s literature was never the same again.
Takeout Kids: Rama
Rama has a busy week of school, Arabic classes and helping out in her family’s Jordanian restaurant in Kingsland, Tāmaki Makaurau. When the weekend comes, all she wants to do is visit the arcade with her dad.
When it comes to watching telly, it’s chaos out here. These days, you need Google, shared Notes, maybe even a cursed Excel document, to organise your nightly viewing itinerary. Only one thing is guaranteed: your way of finding and watching your favourite TV shows is completely different to mine and the next guy’s.
That’s what makes diving into data about what we spent our time watching this year – sourced from the bright minds at ThinkTV – more fascinating than ever. What did we actually watch? How did we watch it? Where did we watch it? And who did we watch it with?
In a world where hundreds of TV shows debut each year, in which four sporting world cups have been held in the past few months, and when TV shows can disappear as quickly as they arrive, then be resurrected on an entirely different service, these questions have became more important to answer than ever.
So we’re going to try. We’ve sifted through the data, looked at the trends, and analysed the figures. And we’ve also gazed into our crystal ball to see what might be coming next year. Here are some thoughts. They’re all over the place – just like watching TV right now.
Paddy Gower is Newshub’s biggest star
Patrick Gower: On Booze (Photo: Three)
He’s done hate, booze and “all the drugs”. Patrick Gower’s one-off specials are huge raters for Three and ThreeNow, especially in the crucial 25-54 age bracket (that’s the one advertisers, and therefore networks, care about the most). This year, his special on booze managed to briefly topple One News from its perch. Now he’s run out of vices to cover, Gower’s getting his very own show – Paddy Gower Has Issues – next year. Expect Paddy to be everywhere in 2023, and beyond.
We still love rugby – especially when the Black Ferns are winning
Nothing came close to matching the excitement, the wonder, the sheer exuberance of the Black Ferns and their titanic toppling of England in the Rugby World Cup final. More than a million of us tuned in to watch it together, making it the single biggest local viewing experience of the year. But that’s not all. In the 5+ age bracket, three of the top five live TV viewing experiences were sport. In the 25-54 bracket, all five were sport. Sixteen of the top 20 were sport. No wonder TVNZ snapped up rights to the Black Caps from next year. Discovery, which aired that titanic Black Ferns finale, needs to have a long, hard think about how it’s going to react over the holidays.
We really, truly love Bluey
Never underestimate the influence of five-year-olds. For more than 130 episodes, this animated Aussie production about the antics of a family of blue heelers has become an international juggernaut. There’s a podcast that breaks down every seven-minute episode, a live stage show is touring America, and they can’t make enough toys to satisfy demand. Take that, Peppa Pig. All three seasons stream on TVNZ+ and it was the service’s most streamed show for the year. My daughter’s aged out of it now, yet she still makes me do the dance every time she hears that theme tune.
Appointment viewing is making a comeback
The Black Ferns are world champions (Photo: Hannah Peters/Getty)
We watched the rugby together. We watched Paddy Gower’s booze special together. We watched Fair Go, Country Calendar and Grand Designs NZ together. “Traditionally delivered linear TV remains a substantial mass reach medium,” says ThinkTV chair Donna Gurney. Anecdotally, streaming also seems to be enjoying a resurgence of appointment viewing. Hands up if you binged each episode of The White Lotus on Monday nights then spent all of Tuesday boring your workmates with your theories. (If international streaming services released local viewing statistics there’d be much more to say here, but they don’t, so we can’t include them in this piece.)
Linear TV still has more reach than streaming
Despite the predictions of its inevitable demise, far more of us watch linear TV than streaming services. More than 4.3 million of us – that’s a whopping 93% – have watched something on TV One, TV2, Three or Prime TV in the past year. Daily, 2.1 million tune in, and weekly, three million switch on the box. “The linear ‘lean back’ experience of watching a curated channel remains highly valued by audiences,” confirms Gurney. Those stats are down year-on-year, but compared to paid streaming services, which only 33% of us use, they’re way higher.
The classics are still going strong
Don’t expect Fair Go, Country Calendar, One News at Six, Shortland Street, or Grand Designs NZ to go anywhere. They’re still big faves, and they’re still doing big numbers. Perhaps producers should consider some crossover episodes to keep things interesting.
Some pretty random shows are surprisingly popular
Shout out to all you CSI fans watching your favourite murder investigations play out on TVNZ+. Same with MAFS Australia, the mosts popular show anyone is watching on ThreeNow. Other random shows doing the numbers on TVNZ+ are Friends, Halo and Outrageous Fortune (time for a reboot?). On ThreeNow, four different version of the Below Deck franchise feature in the top 20, alongside 90 Day Fiance, Alaskan Bush People and something called Gold Rush.
Some wild predictions for 2023
More sport! Expect the (men’s 50 over) Cricket World Cup (the one we still haven’t got over losing* in 2019), the (men’s) Rugby World Cup and the New Zealand co-hosted Fifa Women’s World Cup to be very big deals. Consolidation is coming sooner rather than later to TV streaming, so some services may start folding, while others get bundled together to cut costs. An HBO streaming service is due at some point. Fingers crossed the Sky Box shows up eventually. Ads could be coming to services like Netflix and Disney TV+. Expect linear TV to line-up more appointment viewing opportunities. Weekly Telethons, anyone?
Honestly, though, making predictions about the looming TV landscape is a mug’s game because everything is so up in the air. Only one thing is for sure: Bluey will be there (on TVNZ+) to help you dance your troubles away.
The top fives
TVNZ+ (streams)
1. Bluey
2. Shortland Street
3. Home and Away
4. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
5. One News at Six
ThreeNow (streams)
1. Married at First Sight Australia
2. Newshub Live at 6pm
3. Gold Rush
4. The Block Redemption
5. The Project
Live 5+ (no sport)
1. One News
2. Hyundai Country Calendar
3. Fair Go
4. ASB Gamechanger
5. Seven Sharp
Live 25-54 (no sport)
1. Patrick Gower: On Booze
2. One News
3. Hyundai Country Calendar
4. Sunday
5. Grand Designs New Zealand
Live 5+ (inc sport)
1. Intl Women’s Rugby World Cup [NZL v ENG]
2. Intl Women’s Rugby WC Post Game [NZL v ENG]
3. One News
4. Intl Women’s Rugby World Cup [NZL v FRA]
5. Hyundai Country Calendar
Live 25-54 (inc sport)
1. Intl Women’s Rugby World Cup [NZL v ENG]
2. Intl Women’s Rugby WC Post Game [NZL v ENG]
3. Intl Rugby [NZL v IRE]
4. Intl Rugby Bledisloe Cup [NZL v AUS]
5. Intl Rugby [NZL v IRE]
