spinofflive
A compilation of the worst Jacinda Ardern merchandise.
A compilation of the worst Jacinda Ardern merchandise.

SocietyJanuary 24, 2023

The 10 worst items of unofficial Jacinda Ardern merch

A compilation of the worst Jacinda Ardern merchandise.
A compilation of the worst Jacinda Ardern merchandise.

Today is Jacinda Ardern’s last day as prime minister of New Zealand. To mark the occasion, here’s some terrible tat.

How do you immortalise six years of leadership and countless media moments? In the spirit of capitalist fandom, you make merchandise. 

Online marketplace Redbubble made the news in 2017 for selling Jacinda Ardern-branded clothing. It turns out things have gotten stranger since then. Here are some of the weirdest, worst and most unnecessary items celebrating or berating our now-former prime minister. Arguably, these say more about us as a nation than they do about her.

10. MAGA baseball cap

On the one hand, there is nothing weird or surprising about Trump slogans being recycled into anti-Ardern accessories. On the other hand, it is quite odd that an unknown number of people now own completely redundant hats.

9. Golf balls

Hitting something printed with the face of someone you dislike is a classic form of catharsis. Alternatively, Ardern could be signalling her new retirement plan. 

8. ‘Mentally dating’ mug

Novelty mugs have presumably been around since the dawn of pottery, but this one surely deserves a shelf in the annals of creepy crockery. Finally, Jacinda can spend more time with her actual fiancé – and you can drown your weirdly jealous sorrows in another cup of tea. 

7. WWJAD T-shirt

For some, Ardern ascended to a Christ-like figure. If we’re not mentally dating her, we’re praying to her for divine inspiration. What would JA do? Probably not wear this T-shirt.

6. Mask

Since the PM’s resignation, numerous articles have highlighted the vitriol and sexism that she endured. Even in discussing Jacinda’s departure, Fox News host Tucker Carlson referred to her as the “lady with the big teeth”. So what better way to show your solidarity with women leaders than by donning this relentlessly cheerful mask?

5. Stardust sticker

What do David Bowie and Jacinda Ardern have in common? Almost nothing, but her ‘stardust’ qualities catapulted our former PM to international, if not interstellar, fame. Stick this wherever you need a little Ziggy in your day.

4. The Scream, revisited

This “original” creation first got media attention in the run up to the 2017 election. It seems the buyer put it up for sale in light of recent developments. Weird that only six people have watchlisted so far.

3. Ardern air freshener

It’s been a tumultuous start to the year, but perhaps we need a fresh perspective. Give yourself and your passengers a dose of tough love, plus a hint of apple, with this Jacinda-branded air freshener.

2. Throw-back blanket 

Have you lost sleep worrying about the future of Labour since Thursday’s announcement? Comfort yourself and confound your lovers with this bewildering bedspread. Also available as a duvet cover, pillow case, tote bag, and tapestry. 

1. Leg spread shorts

Remember when our new Prime Minister told us all to spread our legs in lockdown? Now you can do so with Jacinda’s face spread across your lower limbs. Chris Hipkins has already enjoyed a flood of merch for that particular faux pas. Time will tell what else the internet has in store for him. 

‘Hutt Valley, Kāpiti, down to the south coast. Our Wellington coverage is powered by members.’
Joel MacManus
— Wellington editor
Gif of an e-bike with lightning as the pedal with a background of money notes.
Image: Tina Tiller

OPINIONSocietyJanuary 24, 2023

Why New Zealand needs an e-bike rebate

Gif of an e-bike with lightning as the pedal with a background of money notes.
Image: Tina Tiller

The Clean Car Discount has helped record numbers into more sustainable transport. But what about those who can’t afford a hybrid or EV?

Since 2021, the government’s Clean Car Discount scheme has gotten record numbers of New Zealanders out of gas guzzlers and into electric vehicles. Thanks to the discount, in 2022, EVs made up 15% of all new vehicle sales. That figure rose to 20% in December, setting new yearly and monthly records, respectively. This discount scheme, otherwise known as a rebate, offers up to $8,625 back on the price of low and zero-emissions cars. 

Up to $8,625 back on the price of a clean car sounds great, but plenty of New Zealanders can’t afford to fork out the thousands of dollars it costs to buy an EV or hybrid in the first place. The cheapest clean cars I could find on Trade Me cost over $10,000, well out of the budget of most students, beneficiaries and low-income earners.  

‘Become a member and help us keep local, independent journalism thriving.’
Alice Neville
— Deputy editor

People who can’t afford a clean car still deserve the option to transition to sustainable transport beyond unreliable public transport. So how can we bridge the gap?

The answer, according to national and local governments around the globe, is an e-bike rebate. From North America to Europe, people who can’t afford clean cars can instead join the sustainable transport revolution on a discounted e-bike. Compared to the $10,000 plus for a clean car, e-bikes can be bought for as little as $1,000 on Trade Me. 

Used e-bikes found on Trade Me.
Some of the cheapest Trade Me e-bikes I could find, neither of which qualify for a clean vehicle rebate… yet. (Photo: Trade Me)

It’s not even like e-bike rebates are a new idea in New Zealand. In 2019, the government introduced an e-bike discount scheme for public sector staff. The discount ranged from $300-$1,200, which equated to between 10% to 50% off of an e-bike price tag. 

Even in the USA, the home of car dependency, more and more places are adopting e-bike rebates. 2022 saw five states introduce the discount, and more states, including California and Oregon, are starting them up. The proposed Californian discount is up to US$1,500 ($2,351), whereas Oregon’s would top out at US$1,700 ($2,661). In some states, rebates are higher for lower-income earners, students or people without cars.

France is currently taking an aggressive approach to cut transport emissions, including an impressive e-bike rebate. To maximise their return on this scheme, French citizens must trade in their petrol car for an e-bike. Low-income French citizens who live in low-emission urban zones get the most out of the rebate, up to €4,000 ($6,785). Other French citizens are eligible for a discount proportional to their income, and those who aren’t willing to trade in their car can only get a €400 ($678) rebate. 

Two bikes along the river Seine in Paris with the Eiffel Tower in the background.
Bikes have become an important part of France’s climate crisis response. This bike and pedestrian space along the river Seine up until recently was a highway. (Photo: Paris Tourist Office)

A NZTA study into the public sector e-bike discount found that further schemes are worthy of investment. But NZTA suggested that any future rebate specifically needs to make e-bikes more financially accessible for lower income people. If the New Zealand government wants to avoid another financial blunder like the cost-of-living payments (where New Zealanders overseas and even deceased people received it in error), it could make the rebate proportional to income like many of the international examples. 

Getting people onto e-bikes as opposed to EV and hybrid cars is a much more space-efficient use of our transport and parking infrastructure. My e-bike could fit six times over in the on-road space of a Nissan Leaf/Toyota Prius (7.9m2) and eight times over for a Tesla Model S (10.89m2). The space efficiency of bikes becomes even more apparent when you factor in that roughly two-thirds of the cars on New Zealand roads are only carrying a single occupant. Regarding parking, NZTA claims that more than 10 bike parks can fit into one car park. It’s simple maths: if the share of people biking dramatically increased, our traffic and parking woes would decrease. 

E-bike rebate policies have proven to be politically popular internationally. With election season fast approaching don’t be surprised if the policy gets picked up by any of our political parties. An e-bike discount is a great way to give people who can’t afford an EV or hybrid car an opportunity to hop on the EV bandwagon. Not only is that good for people’s wallets, but it’s also simultaneously good for the environment and future generations. Sounds like a win-win.