Conclusive proof that the Olympic opening ceremony was designed by the dark lord himself and that we aren’t just watching our brains rot in real time.

The question on everybody’s lips after the opening of the Paris Olympics on Saturday morning was not “WTF was Kelly Clarkson doing there?” or just “WTF?”, but was the ceremony “satanic”?

The results of a scientific poll conducted by a parody account on X called “Not Elon Musk” revealed that tens of thousands of adults, some of whom presumably have jobs and responsibilities that involve sorting fact from fiction (and some bots, who we mustn’t assume aren’t also busy and important) think that yes, it was massively “satanic”.

This charge was further amplified by Andrew Tate, a known online intellectual currently facing charges of rape and sex trafficking. Posting a clip of one of the opening ceremony’s tableaus referencing the historic event of Marie Antoinette’s beheading, Tate wrote “Satanists control the west and they show you that they worship the devil. It’s not a conspiracy theory. They literally show you. Are you blind?”

That particular segment was also set to heavy metal music by French band Gojira. Unbelievably, that is just the beginning of the burning pile of evidence that suggests Satan spent several months planning the opening ceremony. 

High-ranking members of the clergy from churches that have only ever shown themselves to be of the highest moral calibre have also bemoaned one particular scene from the ceremony saying it derided and mocked Christianity.

They were joined by conservative media, conservative politicians, news.com.au and many people who’ve paid to have their Twitter accounts verified. Their complaints were then amplified by other media as clear evidence of a backlash against the opening ceremony and not a) a lack of analysis of this particular portion of the ceremony, b) an inability to discern when you’re unwittingly acting as a mouthpiece for culture war warriors or c) the results of pickling oneself in the rank vat of the 24-hour news and social media cycle.

So, are we blind? Doth the devil walk amongst us? Is the Paris organising committee part of the demonic global cabal? Let’s examine the devildence.

A metal horse galloped down the Seine

Not a single journalist bothered to interview or identify this horse after it did the impossible and galloped on water.  Once again underserved by the liberal mainstream media, Carrie Bradshaw and I can’t help but wonder whether this might be the horse ridden by the first horseman of the apocalypse, who some scholars describe as the antichrist or the offspring of Satan.

Women rose from the water

In a tableau sold to us as being about the famous French value of “equalité” and in recognition of the Olympics achieving something resembling gender equality, golden statues of women rose from the Seine. You know who else rose from the water according to Botticelli? Venus. The pagan goddess is the namesake for the planet Venus, which is also known as the morning star, AKA LUCIFER.  Women have also been proven (via persecution, hysterical fearmongering and scapegoating) to be witches and witches were sometimes said to have communed with the devil.

Minions

Before the yellow cartoon characters created by the Parisian animation studio Illumination accidentally-on-purpose appropriated this name and got cast in the opening ceremony, minions were best known as the envoys and property of one Lucifer S. Atan. This despicable casting can not be a coincidence.

Snoop Dogg

Mr Dogg, the Dogg-father, was not technically part of the opening ceremony but was there and is an official commentator with NBC, AKA the liberal media. What does Snoop do when he’s not crip-walking with the Olympic torch and cheering on athletes from the sidelines? Smoke pot, weed, ganja, Mary Jane and marijuana AKA THE DEVIL’S LETTUCE.

The golden bull

Three X users have reported seeing a golden bull at the opening ceremony. There are unconfirmed reports that it was Moloch, a pagan god or demon most commonly associated with child sacrifice and that he was smoking weed with Snoop beforehand. There is a statue of a golden bull at Palais de Chaillot in the Trocadéro area in Paris which looks a lot like the one in the pictures being shared by satan-hunters online (and might be what’s represented here) but demonic bullshit is as demonic bullshit does.

The drag Jesuses/apostles/Dionysus

The portion of the ceremony featuring 17 drag artists has been described by media and the righteously outraged everywhere as “evoking” the famous Da Vinci painting The Last Supper”.

French Olympic athletes are banned from wearing the hijab but Piers Morgan is bang on, and this is the worst affront to any group of people of a particular religious denomination ever. Monsignor Emmanuel Gobilliard, a delegate of the bishops of France for the Games, said some French athletes had had trouble sleeping because of the fallout. While the official Olympics Twitter account described the blue guy as Dioynus, the greek God of a wine-making, orchards and fruit, vegetation, fertility, festivity, insanity and ritual madness to name but a few things, thankfully one X user pointed out the obvious cover-up and noted that is precisely what “satanists acting out a ritual display of cannibalism” would say.

Other satanists and apologists have said the scene might be referencing a painting by Dutch artist  Jan van Bijlert called The Feast of the Gods which can be seen at Magnin Museum in Dijon, France (AKA the country hosting the Olympics) as opposed to The Last Supper which can be viewed in Milan, Italy (a country not hosting the Olympics). 

“Art historian” Louise Marshall has said there were 17 drag artists and that for the tableau to be a reference to The Last Supper, you’d need 12. “That’s basic. You kind of have to have that number”, the “expert” in Renaissance art told the New York Times.  Marshall recognised the performers as “vogueing” as opposed to standing in groups of three as the apostles do in Da Vinci’s painting. Vogueing is something only the devil-pilled know about.

The organising committee of Paris 2024 has issued a non-apology that is nonetheless being reported as an apology, saying “Clearly there was never an intention to show disrespect to any religious group. [The opening ceremony] tried to celebrate community tolerance. We believe this ambition was achieved. If people have taken any offence we are really sorry.”

This is exactly what you’d expect from satanic globalists who don’t want their Eyes Wide Shut masks ripped from their malevolent faces. The French, who are not at all famous for not caring what the rest of the world thinks, did not give this non-apology in the hope that people just “le shut the fuck up” about it.

The Eiffel Tower

Once described by Aleksandr Petrovsky’s daughter as “hideous” in season six of Sex in the City (Paris edition), the Eiffel Tower is very obviously Satanic. Invert this or any stock image of the Eiffel Tower. Case closed.

Numerology

If you study the science of numerology you will know that P=7 A=1 R=9, I= 9 and S=1. Paris’s number is 9. Invert that as we might a photo of aforementioned Satanic monument, and you get 6. Add two more and Voilà.

Céline Dion can miraculously sing again

Ignore everything you’ve read or heard about Dion’s determination to get back to performing after being diagnosed with a debilitating and rare neurological disorder and her decades-long domination as one of the world’s most powerful vocalists. There is only one way she could have gotten it together for the performance at the opening ceremony and that was by making a pact with Lucifer. I saw Goody Céline with the devil and you ain’t convincing me otherwise.

Could the opening ceremony just have been an overloaded mess of completely bonkers and very French creativity and artistic license? It’s possible.

Was it Satanic? You have the evidence, you are the judge. Complaints can be filed to thedarklord@veryhotmail.com