A frontrunner emerges thanks to another classic Drag Race challenge.
Just past the halfway mark in the season, we’re treated to an episode with at least a couple standout moments.
Firstly Minnie Cooper ends her run on the show with an instantly legendary lipstick message: “Thank you, Spankie, Kween and Yuri for being so kind.” Yes, effectively singling out the three other girls left for being anything but. Any drag queen can shit stir within the workroom; it takes a queen with a PhD in drama to do it after she’s left.
Secondly, we get to the reading mini-challenge which really puts the emphasis on “challenge”. These queens, with the exception of Kween and Hannah, don’t know how to read. An insult without a punchline is not a read, and a proposition is also not a read. We live and we learn, alas.
The main challenge is the classic girl group challenge. It’s a classic for a reasons: it tests the contestant’s ability to write a verse, choreograph a dance routine, remember that choreography, and most crucially, work with others in a team. Regardless of the end result, the girl group challenge is always a highlight of a season. Drag Race is a show where the ability to learn choreography is roughly as important as the line of succession in House of the Dragon, and that’s why we love it.
The teams are decided almost immediately – Beverly, Molly and Yuri on one, Hannah, Kween and Spankie on the other – and, well, the winners are pretty much decided there and then. Beverly outdances her group but underperforms her verse, Yuri completely fades into the background, Molly nails the verse but not the choreography. Hannah, Kween and Spankie nail everything, sorry to say.
Ultimately, the challenge quite clearly shows who is likely to stay in the competition and who isn’t. The song, ‘Bosom Buddies’ as per Drag Race, sounds like a homosexual fax machine, albeit a higher end one.
The runway theme is belts, buckles and chains and honestly, it’s another fantastic one – this may be one of the most consistently great runway seasons ever [citation needed, I don’t watch every franchise, OK?]. If there’s anything to criticise it over, it’s that everybody performs just as expected. Kween is regal and high-fashion, Spankie is rough but full of character, Hannah is expensive and editorial, Molly is less expensive and less editorial, Beverly is a little off in both concept and execution, and Yuri is delightfully out-of-the-box.
Kween, Spankie and Hannah all deservedly win the challenge, Beverly’s fiery performance saves her from the bottom, and we’re left with Molly and Yuri in the bottom two. They lip-sync to ‘Chains (S&M Remix)’ by Tina Arena. I pretty much assume that every Australian queen has lip-synced to ‘Chains’ no fewer than 200 times, so it’s no surprise that Molly has a step up on Yuri, who seems to vibe with the music but not the actual lyrics of the song.
And so…
ELIMINATED: Yuri Guaii
Yuri Guaii, Yuri gone.
Sometimes an elimination is sad, but not necessarily surprising. Would I have personally sent Yuri home? Nope, I would’ve chosen Beverly Kills – I really think we’ve seen everything she has to offer, as we’ll see below, and she’s falling behind what feels like a pretty locked-in top four. But if you bomb the reading challenge, mess up the main challenge, get outshone on the runway, and don’t nail the lip-sync, you get sent home. Yuri should be proud of her showing though. She’s come far enough, the internet loves her, and I hope her booking fee goes up a healthy amount!
5. Beverly Kills
Oh, Beverly. This is why 21 year olds shouldn’t do television. The editors do her dirty this episode by letting her list off every line that has come to define an also-ran – “it’s every bitch for herself”, “I’m ready to show who I am”, “I don’t have a win yet”, “I’m a lip-sync assassin”, “I’m a brilliant dancer”. There’s no question that Beverly is a talented queen, but it takes more than talent to win Drag Race – it takes an attitude that she doesn’t have yet. Which is fair, she’s 21. When I was 21, I couldn’t string a damn sentence together, let alone learn choreography.
On the flipside: This is why 21 year olds should do television. An audience loves to see hubris brought down to size, and Beverly builds herself up as precariously as a house made of sand, only to be brought down swiftly by Kong, and then again by a bottom two placement. The workroom next week is going to be… interesting.
(Also, I hated this quadruple denim runway, but that doesn’t really play into it all that much for me.)
4. Molly Poppinz
Molly is actually quite clearly the star of her group – she so conspicuously nails the rap in one take that Michelle has to explain that they only need to record line-by-line if the timing/attitude is off, verbally pointing to both Beverly and Yuri while she does so. But she’s the second worst out of three, which puts her in the bottom two, where she pretty easily notches a win. Unless something wild happens, I can’t imagine her not making the top four, but this is Drag Race, and a whole lot of things could happen. Hell, they might bring Art Simone back again!
3. Hannah Conda
This episode made me like Hannah! Her understanding that this was Kween Kong’s moment to shine, and stepping aside, was really nice. She did well in the challenge, great on the runway, and well, is almost definitely in the top three unless she messes it up.
2. Spankie Jackzon
There’s not a lot to say about Spankie that I haven’t said in previous weeks. She slays both challenge and runway (she’d be a contender for the win if not for, well, the headline of this piece), and despite the fact that her look is ill-fitting, everybody loves her for it. It speaks to her greatness that the judges don’t criticise her roughness, but now understand it as part of the package. Still a contender, still here to win, if not for…
WINNER: Kween Kong
I’m calling it now: Kween has gotta win this season. And if she doesn’t? Well, then we’ve got a great future All Stars winner.
Kween not only had the best read of the challenge – “Hannah Conda thank you so much for sharing your concerns about the past. Yes, you are an asshole, but since then you’ve really moved forward. You’re a…” – you can finish the rest, I’m sure. She also defused conflict with Beverly in, gasp, a mature way, by straightforwardly stating she didn’t appreciate being talked to in a certain way, didn’t like being projected onto, and frankly, didn’t appreciate her character being questioned. “I just was not here for you yesterday” is, honestly, some of the best reality show conflict resolution I’ve ever seen.
The thing that Kween has which I think puts above the rest of the competition? Kongfidence (sorry). She absolutely glows throughout the main challenge, looks as good as an All Star contestant on her Mean Girls-inspired runway, and asserts herself beautifully in the workroom. That screams winner, and even better, it screams fan favourite.