Our favourite weird and wacky burgers from this year’s Burger Wellington.
For 15 years, hundreds of Wellington eateries have been trying desperately to one-up each other in their annual Burger Wellington entries. Every year, they push the boundaries of what a burger is and can be. This year’s theme, “Play With Your Food” set the stage for chefs to take some big risks, and some of the results are, well… weird.
The Spinoff sent a team of Wellington writers out to try as many of this year’s weirdest entries as possible. These burgers were their favourites.
The Botanist: Smurf ‘n’ Surf, $25
Bryer Oden (@healthsensation)
It’s not time to move on from Brat green just yet, but Smurf blue is making a convincing case. Blue has long been a cultural signifier of the otherworldly. If you’re feeling a bit weird, you dye your hair blue, or you say “yo listen up here’s a story” and write a song about a little guy that lives in a blue world, or you paint a series of blue paintings that become world-renowned for being disquieting. Smurf ‘n’ Surf is no different: it promised otherworldly, and that’s what we got.
I must confess, I was ready for this to be terrible. After hearing the rule that you shouldn’t drink anything that’s blue (and regretfully having the worst hangover of my life after consuming a fishbowl (cocktail edition not pet store edition)), I assumed the same went for food. I was WRONG. This is one of the most tasty and enjoyable burgers I’ve ever had.
The beef Plan*t patty had the juiciest, smokiest flavour, and the “fish” goujons added an incredible crunch with a burst of sweetness from the baby corn. The seaweed involved was not nori, but rather seaweed salad with béarnaise and tartare sauce, which was the star of the show and achieved a level of interest, refreshment and creaminess that many other burgers don’t quite manage. All of these flavours came together in a gorgeous symphony of veganism. I can’t explain the blob of mashed potato served in a seashell, or the extreme sodium levels of the Jalapeño salt sand, but I don’t want it to be explained. It sparked unmatched levels of weird, cartoonish joy. Smurf ‘n’ Surf, thank you for matching my freak.
Glou Glou: The Croger, $21
Nick Iles
At its best, Welly on a Plate is an opportunity for chefs and restaurateurs to showcase what makes them so special to a wider audience. Among them are places that have a genuine sense of identity that know they don’t need to turn their kitchens upside down in order to impress; rather they take a quarter step in a new direction and reframe what is already brilliant. Glou Glou has been brilliant from their very first pop-up in November last year. Their formula was undeniable: Instagrammable pastries laminated to perfection, filled and topped with bright, sweet things and served alongside some of the best coffee in town. But there was a trick that is often missed by this kind of venture – they tasted even better than they looked. It was not the emperor’s new clothes, rather the perfect synthesis of form and content, visuals and flavour. This burger is no different.
The signature croissant dough is at once buttery, flakey and doing all the things a good laminated dough should. It contains buttermilk brined chicken which has no right being so moist and crisp at the same time; thigh meat is not used enough in burgers and here it shows how excellent it can be. All this is slathered in a creamy ranch dressing, dotted with sharp pickles and layered with crisp iceberg lettuce. On paper it seems decadent and silly, but in reality it all balances perfectly. The croissant bun acts like a well toasted brioche, with a deep nuttiness and warmth. Glou Glou has fast built a reputation as somewhere quite special, and this burger is the perfect example of what it is they do.
Beach Babylon: Charlie Goes Snap Crackle Pop, $26
Jan Otis (@foodexperiencenz)
This is what Wellington on a Plate is all about – experimenting, being creative and just having fun with it. This burger is the definition of playful – it has different colours and a good balance of sweet and savoury with unique combos.
This burger is a fried chicken burger, but it isn’t a normal fried chicken burger – it is a rice crispy coated chicken burger! It has a super crunchy exterior with a perfectly cooked chicken thigh. Now the fun stuff. The popping candy bacon adds a nice sweet and smokey touch. The nacho cheese sauce oozing out of the burger that adds a creamy element. The combo of the green aioli and sour blueberry jam surprisingly works well with everything else. Add the purple potato bun, poppadom and sparkling candle and you have a very fun and enjoyable burger. Beach Babylon’s Wellington on a Plate menu revolves around “the World of Welly Wonka” and the whole restaurant is decorated to suit the theme. They’ve gone all-in and it’s quite a vibe.
The Featherston: It’s a Burger, Wellington, $26
Lachie Robertson
At first glance, the It’s a Burger, Wellington appears to be a pie passing itself off as a burger. Going into the meal I was ready to dismiss this as a farce. Sure a pastry with minced beef, cheese and bacon cannot meet the sacred culinary title of burger?
Some say that if you need a knife and fork, its not a burger. I’m inclined to agree, yet I took up those fancy tools and got stuck in. That first bite was a surprise – not like a hit-you-in-the-mouth-with-flavour surprise, more like the comfort and joy you get from spending time with an old friend.
The pastry was light but held both the flavour and structure of the meal with grace. The thick beef interior was deeply flavourful with a pop of black pepper and smoky morsels of bacon. There was a classic cheesy punch and a tang of pickle, giving it distinctive burger flavour.
The more I ate, the more I enjoyed. This burger was more than it appeared. I didn’t really stop to think that mashed potato and a jug of gravy isn’t a typical side for a burger, but then again, this burger was anything but typical. From start to finish, I was charmed. I’m convinced. Looks can be deceiving and after digging into this feast, I will confidently say that it is one of the burgers of all time.
Preyanka Gothanayagi
What is a burger? Fans of the sandwich alignment chart may have their own strong opinions, but I’m not here to judge – just eat. So if the Featherston City Tavern insists their WOAP offering is, in fact, a burger, who am I to say otherwise?
If a hearty meal is what you’re looking for, this fits the bill. It comes pre-cut and piping hot, visibly steaming in the cooler air. The thick, rich beef patty is enhanced by the slightest sweet cut-through of pickles, elevating it from what a traditional beef wellington would be. There’s enough melted swiss cheese to play with, the gravy is smooth and tasty, and the salty bacon tops it all off. As for the encasing pastry, it was neither too light, nor too heavy. (It also wasn’t bun shaped, but I’m not complaining.)
I savoured it during a lunch break after battling Wellington’s icy winds, and it was enough to make me rethink corporate life in favour of setting up shop in a hobbit hole somewhere. Fair warning though, like its namesake, it is meaty. Definitely a dish for the expats and the carnivores amongst us. Extra points for the wordplay.
Master Kong: Mee Kong Delta,$27
Sean Burnett Dugdale-Martin
This burger is tall. Climbing more than half way up its skewer-stick, this thing is a stack that’s bound to get messy. One thin crispy fried chicken layer has five-spice bacon and an egg above it, some chilli and spring onion slaw, and a crispy noodle basket below it, all sandwiched between two brioche buns. This burger is surprisingly light, a relief after several beef-heavy burgers. The egg pops yolk on my first bite and gives the whole thing a rich taste. The spice level is fairly mild, but the sriracha mayo in the ramekin adds a life-changing kick. Taking breaks every third bite to spoon on more mayo gave me a precious moment between furious mouthfuls to truly appreciate just how crunchy the noodles stayed during the course of the meal. I love crispy chicken but I often find that it loses its crispiness around halfway. These noodles stayed light and kept their crunch from Go to WOA(p) (nice). I had my doubts about the noodle basket, I won’t lie, but it all paid off in the end.
The Hudson: Hunt For The Cheeserpeople, $23
John Steele
After nearly two weeks of eating big sloppy burgers, this skewered fondue feels more light and fresh. When it first arrived I was a bit confused on how to attack this thing – but that was part of the fun.
The deep fried beef patties were crispy yet tender. They were a familiar reminder of a traditional burger, while also bringing something new to the table. Dunking each piece into the fondue or the mustard really allowed for separate and distinct burst of flavour with each bite – though at point I felt a bit silly just munching on a lettuce leaf or a cherry tomato. I left The Hudson feeling satisfied but not bloated. I’d recommend ordering an extra bowl of fries as they are by far the best thing to dip in the fondue.
The Library: The Jenga Jelly Tip, $27
Zoë Mills
The Library’s Jenga Jelly Tip burger takes “playing with your food” very literally. The wow factor comes from the edible “jenga” sticks – each filled with ice cream and coated in a layer of chocolate. I recommend leaving the sticks out at room temp for a few minutes before eating to maximise the ice-creaminess. The jenga sticks are served alongside a warm brioche bun and a berry coulis “ketchup”, and when combined tastes like a jammy donut.
The jenga blocks of berry, chocolate and vanilla weren’t overly sweet, and the chocolate coating added a nice crunchy texture to the ice cream. I found myself dipping the sticks straight into the coulis like a french fry. If you’re wanting to attempt a true jenga experience, you can choose to add on extra “blocks” for $4.
My favourite aspect of the burger wasn’t actually the burger itself, but the activity of eating it. Split amongst our group, it was a fun and interactive eating experience. Was our attempt at playing jenga extremely short? Yes. But the novelty was still really fun.
Read more: The best value burgers at this year’s Burger Wellington