meme credit: [redacted]

PoliticsSeptember 15, 2020

The week in memes: A cooked spinach tax policy from Labour

Editor

meme credit: [redacted]

Too much news? Welcome to the only round-up you need.

Mōrena and welcome to another week. Another week of what, you ask? It doesn’t matter, another week is enough at this point.

Labour’s Tax Policy – NO

Labour and tax. Like two magnetic south poles, they will never connect. For days, finance minister Grant Robertson and Labour teased their big tax policy, confidently alluding to higher tax for top earners. Then they delivered their big tax policy and it was, well, underwhelming is the word that comes to mind. The big reveal was a new top bracket of 39% for earnings over $180,000. Know how many people earn over $180,000 a year? Not many! About 2% of New Zealanders, in fact. With the next tax bracket down being 33% for earnings over $70,000, there’s a whole lot of six-figure earners sitting pretty tax-wise. Not exactly the demographic you’d think Labour would be wanting to assist.

The below meme is not mine, it was posted by someone who wishes to remain anonymous but it captured my mood so perfectly I had to use it. Thank you, Anonymous.

Maths – YES

It’s always a good time to remind everyone how progressive tax works. Each bracket is for earnings over the stated amount. If you earn less than $14,000 in a financial year, you will pay 10.5% tax on whatever you earn. If you earn $20,000 in a year you will pay 10.5% on $14,000 and 17.5% (the next tax bracket) on the remaining $6,000. You will not pay the higher tax bracket on everything, only earnings that are within that bracket. In other words, an increase in a particular tax bracket will not affect the tax on your total earnings. Here’s an example: under Labour’s big mighty tax plan, someone earning $185,000 (aka a lot) will pay an extra $300 in tax (aka not a lot). Tax is scary but it’s also the most weaponised tool in political campaigning. If someone you know has forgotten how progressive tax works, remind them!

The All Blacks – NO

New Zealand has lost its bid to host the Rugby Championships in November. Did that sentence evoke a deep sadness within you? No? You may be living in a New Zealand where rugby no longer holds the cultural power it once did (”once” being six months ago). The New Zealand Rugby Union and Sanzar seem to be at odds with Ardern and the government over why exactly New Zealand lost the bid to Australia, but it’s clear that the quarantine requirements in Australia were favoured over New Zealand. Given that around 70% of New Zealanders still support the government’s response to Covid-19, not hosting this tournament is probably not a huge deal for most people. Nothing like a global pandemic to give a wee country a bit of perspective.

I genuinely think this could be a turning point in how New Zealand views itself as a country and I am 100% here for it.

Campaign ads – NO

Labour and National released their first official campaign video ads. They both featured the party leaders wearing a white blouse with a coloured blazer (red for Ardern, blue for Collins) and saying words like “infrastructure” and “business”. Ardern delivered hers in a single take while Collins seemingly required some subtle editing (this is an OIA for how many takes it took Ardern to deliver the full monologue in one go). Otherwise they were interchangeable ads filled with buzzwords and not much else. Yay for centrists.

New Zealand (excluding Auckland) – YES

Jacinda Ardern announced yesterday that next Monday (September 21) New Zealand would move to level one. All of New Zealand except for Auckland, where level 2.5 will remain in place until further notice. Auckland really is that smartarse kid who has all the fun during class and then has to stay behind at the end of the day, so who’s the real loser?

Jake Bezzant – NO

Don’t know who Jake Bezzant is? You may never need to. Bezzant is the National candidate in Upper Harbour, taking over from outgoing Paula Bennett in an extremely winnable seat. On Monday, BusinessDesk published an article about Bezzant headlined “National candidate’s questionable exit from tech firm“. There’s a lot of he said, he said about whether or not Bezzant has been entirely accurate about his career to date but it may be simply another new National guy causing unnecessary trouble for the party.

Bezzant joins first-and-probably-last-term MP Hamish Walker (private Covid-19 data leak), first-and-definitely-last-term MP Andrew Falloon (sexually explicit photos sent to young women) and fellow first-time candidate William Wood (photo of him impersonating Hitler was found online). If I can find your loser ex online within six minutes of you mentioning him by first name only, then National can surely background check their new candidates better.

Madeleine Chapman, Auckland Central candidate – HUH?

My workmate sent me this today. I don’t know how to interpret it so will just present it without comment. Kia pai tō rā.

Keep going!

Producer Annabelle Lee-Mather and host Mihingarangi Forbes of The Hui. (Image: supplied)

PoliticsSeptember 15, 2020

Mihingarangi Forbes: Five whare rules to avoid getting booted from my TV debate

Mihingarangi Forbes

Guest writer

Producer Annabelle Lee-Mather and host Mihingarangi Forbes of The Hui. (Image: supplied)

With the first of the Hui Pōti 2020 debates on tonight, Mihingarangi Forbes – who’ll be keeping those vying for votes in the seven Māori electorates in line – shares some words of wisdom.

As one of my impertinent children pointed out this week, I have been a journalist since “LAST CENTURY” (they’re now grounded), which means I have covered a fair few elections in my time. Every one is a challenge for different reasons. But that’s what makes them so exciting.

Early in the 2020 campaign there were suggestions from the new National Party leader Judith Collins that the party might have a flutter in the Māori electorates, but so far not a single horse has entered the stalls. Despite their Treaty of Waitangi policy, the Greens too have failed to back a horse in four of the seven seats, leaving just co-leader Marama Davidson, Elizabeth Kerekere and Ariana Paretutanganui-Tamati to wear the party’s silks. After its catastrophic loss last election, the Māori Party is running on a heavy track, but there is still hope co-leader Debbie Ngarewa Packer could prove to be a dark horse in Te Tai Hauāuru.

The Hui team weekly editorial meeting (Photo: Supplied)

Currently Labour is the odds-on favourite in the Māori electorates, but as we know, things can change quickly in politics. Cast your mind back three years ago to when Bill English looked as though he was going to cakewalk his way to the treasury benches, mea rawa ake (nek minute) – Jacindamania.

The Hui Pōti 2020 electorate debates are a chance for Māori to get a good look at those vying for their votes.

Every Māori broadcaster comes with a kete of experiences, knowledge and tricks. The thing that has prepared me best for wrangling potential politicians in electorate debates is not my decades of experience as a journalist. Nor is it my extensive knowledge of horse-racing clichés. Instead it’s being a mum. Catering to different personalities, ages and skills, juggling competing demands, refereeing, giving good growlings and knowing how to get everyone out the door in a timely manner (still working on this TBH).

All those skills will be deployed when yours truly facilitates seven Māori electorate debates, starting tonight with Tāmaki Makaurau.

So for those taking part, here are the Five Forbes Whare Rules to make sure you aren’t put in time out on national TV.

1. We are whanaunga first, last and always.

Relationships between Māori pre-date and outlast any election campaign. Politicians who forget that will be reminded at the ballot box. Māori voters don’t like it when their candidates fight dirty. That doesn’t mean it’s all polite niceties and no argy-bargy – nothing involving John Tamihere could ever be described as “polite” – but basic whaikōrero rules apply: the kaupapa gets robustly discussed but never at the expense of the whanaungatanga. Patua te kaupapa, kaua ko te tangata.

2. Answer questions honestly or you’ll be in big trouble.

Kaua e teka. Don’t try to bullshit. You will be found out and it will be bad for you when you are.

3. Do your homework.

Remember the seven Ps: poor planning and preparation produces piss-poor performance.

Do your mahi kāinga, people. Know what you want to say, and make sure you say it concisely… no faffing about or holding court. Inevitably there will be a question you may not feel confident about. The best advice on how to handle this doesn’t come from me, but from Nanaia Mahuta, who I once overheard in a Māori Television makeup room reassuring a nervous first-time candidate (her opposition). To paraphrase, she basically said people want to know who you are and how you approach things, so if you get a big-picture policy question and your brain freezes, don’t try to bluff, be yourself – describe how you’d approach it as a parent, as a member of your marae committee, as a business owner … what shapes your thinking, which words from your koroua do you hear in times of stress, what kind of future you do want for your tamariki, basically: who are you?

4. Just like mums, cameras see everything.

Just because you aren’t talking doesn’t mean you won’t be on the telly. Some, such as Marama Davidson or Dame Tariana Turia, deploy their aunty eye rolls to great effect. Others, like Hone Harawira, deftly move to get out of any possible camera shot while Brendan Horan was busy decrying the personal hygiene of Māori … (yeah, I’m not exactly sure where that kōrero was going either, but Hone knew enough to know he didn’t want to be anywhere near it). Don’t try to win an Oscar, but do know that while the cameras are rolling so, potentially, are you.

The real star of Simon Bridges’ waitangi speech is @MaramaDavidson 😂😍 pic.twitter.com/C3QjKn2Wt2

— Jesse (@jessethompsonnz) February 3, 2020

5. Be a koha not a hōhā.

In these perilous times we find ourselves in, service leadership has never been more critical.

We need visionary leaders who will act with integrity and mana in the best interests of our people. What we don’t need is cynical politicians who will exploit our people’s vulnerabilities for their own self-interest.

Ina te mahi he rangatira. By their deeds a chief is known.

The Hui Pōti 2020 will be streamed live on newshub.co.nz, threenow.co.nz and Facebook and replayed on Saturday and Sunday mornings on Three.