At least three world leaders have suddenly resigned after coming into close contact with our prime minister, reports Stewart Sowman-Lund.

Christopher Luxon prides himself on a strong handshake. The right arm extends first, gripping the target with ferocity before the left hand whips in to cling onto the wrist as well. But new evidence has emerged suggesting that Luxon’s powerful handshake is more than just a sign of friendship. In fact it could be tantamount to a political kiss of death. Yes, much like Judas singling out Jesus Christ, world leaders deemed worthy of a Luxon handshake have – in at least three cases – soon fallen victim to a most unfortunate fate. The fate of resignation. 

Let’s assess what we know for sure.

Lee Hsien Loong of Singapore

On April 15, Luxon met with Singapore prime minister Lee Hsien Loong during a whirlwind trip to Southeast Asia. A joint statement said the two leaders condemned Russia’s invasion of Ukraine and raised “grave concern” about the situation in Gaza. Loong went straight from that meeting to print off his resignation letter, announcing he was leaving the top job after close to 20 years. You would get some pretty solid long service perks after two decades in one job, but still – the connection here cannot be understated.

Luxon was the final world leader invited to the presidential palace before Loong revealed he was stepping down, and, though it cannot be confirmed for sure, quite possibly the last person he met with in an official capacity before resigning. Curious, very curious. 

Kaja Kallas of Estonia

“Had a very good discussion with [Luxon] at #NATOSummit,” tweeted Kaja Kallas on July 11. How good was it? So good that she quit her role as prime minister just four days later. It was announced on July 15 that Kallas would be taking up a new job as the European Union’s foreign policy chief. 

This photo of the pair from TVNZ’s Logan Church suggests Kallas was unaware of what was in store for her.

 

Joe Biden of the United States 

Arguably the highest profile world leader to have encountered a Luxon grip, our prime minister was one of the last world leaders to have met and gret [greeted] Joe Biden. The pair were photographed interacting at Nato just over a week ago, after which Biden delivered a trainwreck press conference, contracted Covid-19, vanished from the public eye and then quit the presidential race. I’m not saying there’s a connection here, but I am saying that’s a very suspicious set of circumstances.

Unconfirmed: Boris Johnson of the UK

There’s an unconfirmed link between Boris Johnson’s resignation and Christopher Luxon, though the connection is strong enough to warrant further investigation. In 2022, Luxon headed to the UK as opposition leader where he was expected to meet with a range of senior Conservative MPs. But, just a day after meeting with Johnson’s predecessor Theresa May, Johnson stepped down as prime minister, throwing the trip into disarray. It cannot be ruled out that Luxon’s handshake with May (pictured) generated enough right wing political energy that it surreptitiously led to the downfall of Boris Johnson within the same 24 hours later. It cannot also be ruled in.

The leaders to keep a close eye on

There are several world leaders that should be kept firmly in your thoughts and prayers after recent meetings with Luxon at Nato and elsewhere. Not too long ago, Luxon was photographed in this elaborate cross-body, thumbs up handshake situation with France’s Emmanuel Macron. It’s undoubtedly a powerful pose, but is it too powerful? It’s not known if Macron’s recent decision to call a risky snap election has any connection to Luxon, but anything is possible.

Luxon also came into close contact with Canada’s Justin Trudeau and Ukraine’s Volodymyr Zelenskyy at Nato. All are – at the time of publication – still in their positions of power. Can someone check on them, though?