‘Greatest New Zealand writer? Me!’: Wayne Brown’s life in books

Welcome to The Spinoff Books Confessional, in which we get to know the reading habits of Aotearoa writers, and guests. This week: Auckland mayor Wayne Brown.

The book I wish I’d written

A Short History of Everything by Bill Bryson. Bill Bryson has managed to put in one book exactly what he says, a short history of everything. It’s an amazing piece of research, and it’s really good reading. In his usual witty style, he provides entertainment.

The book everyone should read

Terrain by Geoff Chapple. I met Geoff – the guy who initiated the Te Araroa Trail from North Cape to Bluff – and he’s a pretty amazing guy. He walked the trail (again) with a series of geologists and wrote the book Terrain – it’s about the geology of New Zealand. As a trained engineer, you have to learn about geology, and geology is important because it affects all of our infrastructure. Unfortunately, most of the people who are decision makers about infrastructure don’t know anything about it because they’re not engineers, they’re all sorts of other drongos. So this should be compulsory reading for anyone involved in that; and it’s also entertaining.

The book I want to be buried with

Surfing by Jim Heimann. It’s just a big compendium of the whole history, places and knowledge of surfing. It’s a huge book – you can hardly pick it up.

The first book I remember reading by myself

The House at Pooh Corner. AA Milne was the first author I can remember and then Enid Blyton a bit later.

Four book covers ascending. — From left to right: the book Wayne Brown wishes he’d written; the book he thinks we all need to read; the book he’d be buried with; and the first book he remembers reading by himself.

I wish I’d never read

Sandy Hook by Elizabeth Williamson. Sandy Hook is about that hideous American habit of getting guns and shooting children at school. I read it and just felt so depressed, because there’s nothing I can do about it.

The book I pretend I’ve read

Tolstoy’s War and Peace. I’ve had a couple of goes at it, but I’ve never got through it. I certainly haven’t read the Auckland Council Unitary Plan, although I’ve read bits and pieces of it and know quite a bit about it out of it.

It’s a crime against language to…

I hate bad spelling. I don’t know why you should allow bad spelling. These days, you’ve just got to press a button and the correct spelling comes up.

The book that haunts me

Everything Lost, Everything Found by Matthew Hooton. It’s not the Matthew Hooton that I know well, it’s another Matthew Hooton. It’s about a kid who grows up in Fordlândia built by Henry Ford, who founded the Ford motor company, who had so much money he decided he’d take over a big area of the Amazon, knock down all the trees and grow rubber for his cars. It didn’t work at all because he tried to make American life work in the middle of the jungle. This kid grows up there and survives it. He talks about it later in his life when he’s an elderly man in Seattle. But it’s a horrendous story of survival. I’ve been through the Amazon. I’ve been I’ve been to Manaus, which is the capital of the Amazonas state in Brazil. It was a place I always wanted to go to.

The book that made me cry

Eighth Army by Robin Neillands. Not that I cry, but it was my dad’s war experience. I think it’s on page 83 that my dad is quoted, in his perfunctory way, of a night in the desert campaign. They lose about 35 guys, take 50 German prisoners, and everybody around them is dying.

The book that made me laugh

Emotionally Weird by Kate Atkinson. She’s fantastic and this is the weirdest, funniest one of the lot. It’s just so hilarious, the whole book, you have to read it.

The book character I identify with most

Jackson Brody is a character that isn’t in Emotionally Weird, but he is in quite a few of Kate Atkinson’s books. He’s a low key sort of guy.

The book I wish would be adapted for film or TV

Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe. This was one of the greatest books I’ve ever read and it was made into the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Someone needs to have another go at turning it into a movie.

Most underrated book

The Shipping News by Annie Proulx. This was an absolutely glorious book, that was made into a great movie.

Encounter with an author

Geoff Chapple, who I mentioned earlier. He and I opened the Te Araroa trail – he’s a really entertaining guy who I think is fantastic.

Greatest New Zealand book

The Five-Minute MBA by Wayne Brown. This book made me the bestselling New Zealand author in Brazil – the book was translated into Portuguese. Who would have thought I’d be New Zealand’s bestselling author in Brazil?