We review the entire country and culture of New Zealand, one thing at a time. Today, Whittaker’s controversial coconut ice ‘gender reveal’ chocolate.
Whittaker’s latest release is inspired both by that classic Kiwi school fair staple, coconut ice, and by the bizarre phenomenon of the baby gender reveal party. (If you’re not familiar, that’s when parents-to-be reveal the exciting news of what genitalia their unborn child possesses to their possibly not-particularly-interested friends through the medium of gender-stereotyped pink or blue shit.)
Anyhoo, this here chocolate comes in both pink and blue versions and – PLOT TWIST! – you don’t know what you’re getting until you open it. Twenty cents from each block goes to Plunket, which is cool, but unsurprisingly, Whittaker’s has copped a bit of flak for perpetuating gender stereotypes and ignoring the existence of non-binary people and others in the rainbow community. Cadbury must be stoked.
We bought two blocks at random and – SURPRISE! – managed to get one variety of each: a blue chocolate “boy” baby and a pink chocolate “girl” baby. Whittaker’s reckons they taste identical but some of our expert panel felt differently.
NB: A source close to The Spinoff Board of Review has revealed you can figure out which colour chocolate you’re getting before you open it by reading the ingredients list: pink has beetroot, blue spirulina.
Here are some of our thoughts:
It tastes only a little bit like coconut ice but not enough like coconut ice. Coconut ice is delicious and nothing can compare. This is very sickly, as white chocolate often is, but I ain’t complaining. I thought the pink was nicer but possibly that’s because I tried it first. I would not buy again but I would eat it if it was in my vicinity because it’s chocolate.
Bleurgh the pink one is disgusting. The blue is marginally better.
It’s very bad. There’s not an awful lot I can add to that. It’s overly gritty. Tasteless. Blue food shouldn’t exist.
I am generally a big fan of this white chocolate and coconut innovation. To me, it doesn’t taste much like coconut ice, and is certainly missing the beloved chalky texture. The pink one is yummy, the blue one tastes like sweet emptiness. Here’s a tip: utilising the white chocolate on the bottom, you could combine both blocks and make the trans flag.
The pink one tastes like strawberry, coconut and being paid 76c on the dollar, and the blue one tastes like a Holden and emotional unavailability.
I love me some chocolate and I love me a surprise so I liked not knowing what colour we were gonna get – it’s like a little secret waiting for you. Nice chucky bits of coconut in there just hiding away waiting to spring a taste attack on ya. I blind tasted them bad boys and I could defs taste a small difference between the two. Pink has a slightly more coconutty taste while the blue was a bit more white chocolate tasting. Nom nom over all good chocos.
The only gender reveal I endorse:
My gender reveal!
— Kitty (@mskittenfish) February 17, 2019
Good or bad? Bad.
Verdict: OK, some of us quite liked this stuff, but we’re giving Whittaker’s a fail because the concept is lame.
The Spinoff Weekly compiles the best stories of the week – an essential guide to modern life in New Zealand, emailed out on Monday evenings.