If it has to stop then can we have something else?
As Succession reached its end after four symphonic series, HBO drama boss Francesca Orsi told Deadline: “I’ll never say never but my instinct and based on a number of conversations about the evolution of Succession and these characters, at this stage, there is no intention of spinning any one character off.”
The crucial words above, of course, are “never say never”. Because, after all, if it is to be said, so it be, so it is. Spinoffs need not be pale imitations of the original. Think Cagney and Lacey. Melrose Place. Xena Warrior Princess. Nobody at the website The Spinoff can remember what The Spinoff website is a spinoff of. In that spirit, therefore, some thoughts for a Succession successor.
The Mencken Injunction
As Shiv warns Connor and Willa in the finale, there is that “Wisconsin court thing”. The implication: that far-right smiler Jeryd Mencken may not yet beat his hopey-changey rival Daniel Jiménez to the presidency. A hundred episodes in a sweltering courtroom.
Young Logan
Dundee, 1947, and our young hero is learning fast. His school? The street. He shits where he wants, feasts on decomposing pigeons and swindles feckless local bookmakers. Young Logan is played by Cate Blanchett.
Karl and Frank on Broadway
Were you not moved by Karl singing that Robbie Burns ditty? Booted from the GoJo Waystar mothership, Karl and Frank pursue their first love: musical theatre. Cats. Cabaret. The Producers – on ice. A musical about musicals. Everyone is lovely.
The Killing of a Sacred Deer
All 39 episodes of Succession, retold from the perspective of the deer that Kendall swerved to avoid in the final episode of series one.
Shit Show at the Fuck Factory
There has to be more life in that title.
The Gerri Kellman Show
A succession (that’s right) of guests trail on to the Gerri sofa, where they unfailingly spill their darkest, seediest secrets. Roman Roy sits off to the right, his studded leather collar tethered to the floorboards.
Rhea
Holly Hunter.
Recession
The economic downturn is biting across the world. At Gojo Waystar, the hardworking CEO, Tom Wambsgans, is determined to find efficiencies without cutting his most precious resource: people. Turns out fine!
The Pod of Small Things
The Roy kids make a podcast about their pilgrimage to meet long lost sister Arundhati.
Formally Inventive
Apart from propping up Connor Roy and being named after executive producer Will Ferrell, Willa Ferreyra is a playwright. Across 12 sweeping feature length episodes the Ferreyra oeuvre unfolds, performed in the function room at the US embassy in Slovenia.
Josh
Adrien Brody.
Tom Says Greg
Tom saying Greg for a half hour every week.
The Adventures of Lady Caroline Collingwood
The Roy kids’ mum discovers Lord Lucan in Trinidad and together they plot to remove the eyeballs of her husband, Peter.
Tomlette
An alternate Tom & Greg / Rosencrantz & Guildenstern option: cooking at home with the Disgusting Brothers.
My Name is Jeremy Strong
Brian Cox, Sarah Snook and Kieran Culkin chat about Jeremy Strong’s approach to acting while Strong stands in a white chalk circle, bewildered, deep in character as Kendall. The only television more misanthropic than Succession.
Home Alone 5
In the Succession pilot, it seemed pretty clear that Roman Roy had a wife and daughter, who appeared in a scene then were never heard from again. Inspired by shouting at his brother that his own children aren’t true bloodline Roys, Roman sets out to find them, only to discover – with hilarious consequences – that he left them home alone while vacationing in Paris.
Ebba
Matsson’s former head of comms solves crimes, Swedishly.
Living Plus
A modern-day Tithonus, Kendall Roy is cursed with eternal life, but not eternal youth, ageing into a hideous fruit-fly-orbited raisin on a grounded cruise ship in the Arizona desert. At the end of series 3 he turns into a grasshopper.
Succession: Gore
Succession but set inside the Gore District Council, New Zealand.