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Haiven Spence, age 6, during morning meditation with other first graders at the Robert W Coleman Elementary School in Baltimore, MD on November 2, 2016. The school replaced detention and instead is using mindfulness and meditation as an alternative to discipline. They say it helps children find calmness and control in the chaos of their lives.  Last year school officials said they had no suspensions.The meditation room at the school was created by a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation.   (Photo by Linda Davidson / The Washington Post via Getty Images)
Haiven Spence, age 6, during morning meditation with other first graders at the Robert W Coleman Elementary School in Baltimore, MD on November 2, 2016. The school replaced detention and instead is using mindfulness and meditation as an alternative to discipline. They say it helps children find calmness and control in the chaos of their lives. Last year school officials said they had no suspensions.The meditation room at the school was created by a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation. (Photo by Linda Davidson / The Washington Post via Getty Images)

SocietyMarch 31, 2017

Introducing our new mental health column, Getting Your Shit Together

Haiven Spence, age 6, during morning meditation with other first graders at the Robert W Coleman Elementary School in Baltimore, MD on November 2, 2016. The school replaced detention and instead is using mindfulness and meditation as an alternative to discipline. They say it helps children find calmness and control in the chaos of their lives.  Last year school officials said they had no suspensions.The meditation room at the school was created by a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation.   (Photo by Linda Davidson / The Washington Post via Getty Images)
Haiven Spence, age 6, during morning meditation with other first graders at the Robert W Coleman Elementary School in Baltimore, MD on November 2, 2016. The school replaced detention and instead is using mindfulness and meditation as an alternative to discipline. They say it helps children find calmness and control in the chaos of their lives. Last year school officials said they had no suspensions.The meditation room at the school was created by a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation. (Photo by Linda Davidson / The Washington Post via Getty Images)

In a community known for murder, gangs and drug abuse, yoga and mindfulness is becoming cool. For her first Spinoff column, Auckland mindfulness educator Kristina Cavit explains what we can learn from the experience of kids in inner-city Baltimore.

If you’ve watched The Wire, you’ll know that Baltimore is one of the most dangerous cities in the US. In 2015, shortly after binge watching all five seasons, I took the bus there. I arrived at a primary school gym just blocks from where the riots had begun when 25-year-old Freddie Gray died from neck injuries while in police custody.

Inside, 50 five-year-olds sat meditating. One sassy kid came to the front of the class and directed everyone to align their backs, necks and heads and “inhale in deep, exhale and out”. I’d never seen so many young people meditating and teaching each other how to breathe through troubling times. These kids created calm in the chaos around them.

In a city with the second highest murder rate in America, people talk about how these kids are growing up in an environment akin to a warzone. After a lifetime witnessing violence and trauma, many are showing signs and effects of PTSD. I’d come to Baltimore because I’d heard about some locals who were trying to change that reality.

When brothers Ali and Atman Smith returned home from college in 2001 with their friend Andres Gonzales, they saw that crack had hit hard, taking down a lot of Baltimore families and was turning their streets and homes into open-air drug markets.

All three had spent years studying yoga with a family friend who made the boys promise to teach others. And so they formed Holistic Life Foundation, a not-for-profit organisation dedicated to helping inner-city youth manage emotional challenges through yoga and meditation. Although yoga is more often associated with expensive studios, matching lycra and Instagram celebs doing unattainable poses, the trio knew that it can also be used as a survival tool and a life saver.

Haiven Spence, age 6, during morning meditation with other first graders at a school in Baltimore. The school replaced detention and instead is using mindfulness and meditation as an alternative to discipline, in a partnership with the Holistic Life Foundation. (Photo by Linda Davidson / The Washington Post via Getty Images)

“A lot of the guys that should be out there selling drugs and in gangs, they’re working for us now and inspiring their friends. There are ways to heal that trauma, once you get these skills of yoga and mindfulness it’s basically being able to maintain your peace amongst the chaos,” said Atman Smith in an interview with mindfulness queen Sharon Salzberg.

So how are these guys making change in their community? In Baltimore, where the high school dropout rate is often higher than 50%, 19 of the 20 boys in their original yoga and mindfulness programme graduated from high school. Some of those kids have grown up to be teachers of the Holistic Life Foundation’s mindfulness and yoga programmes themselves. HLF’s programs now reach 3,500 students weekly across 15 schools. The crew is also working in drug rehab centers, old-folks’ homes, mental health facilities and delivering trainings around the country. They’ve even had preliminary studies on their work undertaken by Penn State and John Hopkins universities.

Those Baltimore boys inspired the shit out of me and after eight years working with communities dealing with stress and trauma, I trained with them and other amazing organisations to learn how to pass on mindfulness to others. I trialled my own stress management, yoga and mindfulness program at a NPH home for orphaned and abandoned children in the Dominican Republic, where I had lived for two years. Almost every morning I had a crew of kids banging on my door asking when we’re doing the exercise and relaxation thingy.

Back home in Aotearoa, I started The Kindness Institute in 2016 to support vulnerable communities with stress management, yoga and meditation. I work with women in prison, kids who’ve been kicked out of school and individuals who want to deal with the everyday stress of just living in the 21st century.

Throughout these communities, I tend to see the same thing: an inability to cope with what life’s thrown at us.

Most of us learnt all sorts of crazy shit in school but we weren’t taught how to love ourselves and build strong mental health. We place so much value on perfectionism and success, even at a very young age, but very little effort goes into managing our minds. When we’re stressed or busy, our self-care tends to go out the window and we push our own wellbeing to the bottom of our priorities. I get it – my own school education didn’t really prepare me to handle anything when the shit hit the fan.

But after learning from the Baltimore boys, I know that there are tools to help me chill the hell out and manage stress on even the busiest of days. With mindfulness (a fancy word for being present), yoga and support from damn good friends, I am more easily able to catch myself before an epic freak out, calm my monkey mind and respond to situations with more clarity.

Kristina Cavit. Photo: Amanda Billing

Mindfulness and meditation have been practiced for thousands of years and have become crazy popular in the West, following an increase in scientific research and the discovery that it can literally change your brain. Studies show that mindfulness practice can lead to decreased anxiety and stress, increased focus, positive relationships, self-awareness and conflict resolution skills – pretty much everything you need to nail life.

I’ve seen kids who can’t sit still in their Auckland classrooms come to be really engaged, compassionate individuals who use their deep belly breathing rather than fighting to get their emotions under control. I have kids who’ve previously showed antisocial and criminal behaviours tell me that it’s helped them learn to respect their bodies, to say NO when they mean it and to send love to the greatest assholes in their lives.

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And that’s why I teamed up with The Spinoff to launch a new series, sponsored by the rad people at the Mental Health Foundation of New Zealand, looking at the ups and downs of trying to get our shit together.

To normalise the narrative on how to look after our own mental health, we have to start conversations where the toxic toughen-up culture isn’t glorified anymore. This begins with talking about it, and with allowing our young people to see that kindness is cool.

And with breathing. Breathing in and out.

In the months to come, I’ll share some tools and talk with amazing humans about how we can better support ourselves. The objective isn’t to make your life perfect, but to recognise that we all experience stress to some degree, and we can develop the ability to notice and regulate our mind – no matter if we’re a kid escaping gangs in Baltimore or an Aucklander on the hustle trying to make ends meet.


This column is brought to you by the Mental Health Foundation. The MHF is working to create an Aotearoa where we all feel good most of the time, whether or not you have experience of mental illness. It promotes the Five Ways to Wellbeing – give, be active, take notice, keep learning and connect – because these five amazingly simple strategies really will make a difference to how you live and feel every day.

Keep going!
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SocietyMarch 31, 2017

Meet the man who wants you to glue your vagina shut

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Alex Casey interviews Doctor Dan Dopps, creator of a new vaginal adhesive that hopes to seal the menstrual product deal … literally. 

Bleeders, palm off your pads, trash your tampons and shoot your mooncup straight to the moon. There’s a brand new innovation in time-of-the-month technology called Mensez, a lipstick for your other set of lips that seals everything up down there like an Action Man when you are on your period, until you wee and all the blood evacuates somehow. Sorry, not sorry for the details – and a brief warning that things are going to get a lot more gnarly from here.

This menstruation innovation has been patented by Doctor Dan Dopps, a chiropractor in Wichita, Kansas. When someone first posted the Mensez website on our On the Rag Facebook page, I screamed and screamed and screamed until someone had to seal my mouth shut. Was it a joke? Would it actually work? Why a lipstick? Why us? Why anything?! I had to know more. I had to know everything. I had to … get on Skype with Dr Dan the Period Man himself.

I hope this isn’t too brash to begin, but is Mensez real or is this a Nathan For You hoax?

No, I am for real. Serious. I have a patent on this product and it is definitely for real.

As a woman who has the potential to use this product, can you give me the Shark Tank pitch?

It’s definitely serious and it’s about women. It’s not about me, it’s not about men, it’s about women and the issues that they have with their periods. It’s a tough subject to talk about, it’s taboo and a lot of women feel like men shouldn’t even be talking about it. It’s also an area in the modern world where there’s been no innovation in the last 80 years, you know? Nothing has changed.

[Editor’s note: Hello Mooncups in 2002, Hello Thinx Period Panties in 2008]

I am an innovator, a doctor and I like inventing. I came up with this idea and I think it’s very elegant. It’s going to work and it’s going to be so good for women. It’s not a glue, like so many have been saying. The labia is covered with a mucus membrane and they normally stick together a little bit. All we’re doing is enhancing that attraction so they cling together tight enough to retain the menstrual fluid inside the vagina, in the same place in a vagina that a tampon would be.

Obviously, you are a man of medicine so I feel like I can say this… I just feel like I would want the STRONGEST of glues if I am just going to just freestyle with nothing in there on my period.

Right. Well, it’s strong enough to do what we need but it’s not a superglue many women are afraid of that concept. Like you are saying you want to be secure, and I know that’s a big issue, but it’s not a superglue. The unique thing is that this glue does not react with blood, or sweat or perspiration, it only reacts with urine. When it gets wet with urine, it dissolves.

What if I do a little wee by accident? Am I going to be in big trouble?

You could be. On certain days, it may be a bad thing and it may not be an answer, just like tampons aren’t an answer for all women either. A girl will just have to test it and see if it works for her. Hopefully it will, I’m sure there will be lighter days where it will work just fine.

mfw do a little wee whilst wearing mensez

How are you so confident that this is going work?

Because of my background in chemistry, I’ve tested a lot of things not on women, because we’re not in clinical trials of any kind  I am confident the concept is there. It will take some product development beyond this point, but I was confident enough that the chemistry was going to work that I spent five years and a lot of money to get it patented.

Five years is no joke.

No joke, the patent office wasn’t going to give it to me because they were sure that it had been done before. They searched the world over for five years and found absolutely nothing like this. It is a unique idea. It’s really hard for women, being so used to the status quo, to even take this seriously because of the implications for them. The implications will be very good.

Some inspiration courtesy of the Mensez official website

How does a chiropractor get into the realms of menstrual innovation?

In my college education, I had OBGYN courses and I passed the national board exams. Even though I don’t practice, I know the anatomy and the physiology of female reproduction. I also have a next door neighbour who got Toxic Shock Syndrome from tampons and lost both her legs and seven of her fingers. Knowing her over the years, it’s always been in the back of my mind: why doesn’t someone innovate something new for women? To people who would say that this isn’t part of my specialty everyone knows that innovation comes from thinking outside of the box.

Or inside the box, as it were.

That truly is one of the reasons I believe that nothing has been done. Doctors have been taught to stay in their little corner and so they aren’t doing anything about it. It’s like you, you are a reporter but you might be a really good cook too.

I’m not, but I appreciate the thought.

Everyone has other talents outside of their job, you know?

Very true. Where did you get the idea to put the product inside a lovely lipstick for a lady?

Well, my patent covers different methods of application. It could be a spray or a cream, but I think a lipstick is familiar to women. They know how to use it, they know what it is and it’s about the right consistency of the compound we are proposing to use. It could be in a powder or it could be applied by a mini-panty liner where it would transfer on. But the idea of a lipstick just fits perfectly: it’s just sticking the lips together.

we women love lippy + elegance

I have read that you think women waste 25% of their productivity on periods. That seems like a lot.

I didn’t really mean to say it that way. I just meant that it’s a distraction for women about 25% of the time. Their life just isn’t normal. I use the analogy of playing a football game, and in the fourth quarter of every game the woman is distracted and not playing as well as she could. You aren’t going to win all the games that way.

Let’s say this lipstick idea takes off and women use it and get our 25% focus back, what would you hope we do with the extra time?

Have fun. Be women. Don’t we all just want more time to do the things we love? I don’t mean this in a misogynistic way do you know I didn’t even know what that word meant until about a month ago when someone called me that? I am certainly doing this with women in mind, I won’t ever use it but I think I can help a lot of women.

Do you have volunteers lining up to test the product? How confident are you that they could wear white pants when they test this out?

Oh I’m totally confident. I would suggest when a woman first tries this that she wears some kind of liner for extra security. There are variations in anatomy that may not work for some women, and I’m sure it won’t work for everyone. You’ll just have to build your confidence with it. It’s a very small, concentrated amount of blood, it just looks like a whole bunch. I’ve had thousands of women emailing me saying they want to try it out. 

Where does Mensez go from here?

We’ve had a number of companies contact us, and we are trying to find a good fit. We want someone with the ability to produce it and bring it to market, someone with a good research and development lab. It’s probably going to take a few years from this point to get into consumer’s hands, but I think it will happen.

when mensez hits the shelves…

I read an interview where you mentioned this was just the latest in many patents you own. What else have you invented?

I have an invisible UV paint company, that’s kind of fun. It’s a paint that you spray on anything and it’s invisible until you shine a UV light on it. It’s a fun thing for kids and college students and Hollywood and Governments. I have a patent on a water bottle cap, and a patent on a resealable snack bag. Those are some of the recent ones. I just like innovating, that’s just what I do.

Have you thought about merging the resealable snack bag, the invisible UV paint and the vagina lipstick into one product?

No, I’ll think I’ll leave that one to you.


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