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SocietyAugust 5, 2019

Man’s pest friend: a brief history of rodents in New Zealand

rats (1)

As efforts ramp up to save New Zealand’s native wildlife from invasive species, Johnny Crawford looks back wistfully on the centuries-long relationship between humans and rodents in Aotearoa.

I think all of us can agree that New Zealand has a pest control problem. Our native species have long been terrorised by introduced ones from which they never evolved to protect themselves. These include small, cute mammals like lagomorphs (rabbits, hares), marsupials (possums, wallabies) and mustelids (stoats, ferrets, Jin the otter). But the smallest and cutest introduced mammals in Aotearoa belong to the order with the longest history here. As we prepare for the eradication of all wild rodent life on the archipelago, let’s pour one out for the enduring, complicated relationship we’ve shared.

I should begin this piece with a bit of a disclaimer. Despite being completely sincere in my environmentalism, there is a non-native mammal in my apartment. I am spending the year rodent-sitting my friend’s chinchilla and to be honest, I’ve become quite fond of her. If I lived in Southland (or Australia), it would be illegal for me to harbour a chinchilla but what can I say – I’m a terrible Zealandia member. I know this makes it seem like I’m part of the problem, but generations of inbreeding for their fur have rendered chinchillas remarkably fragile. If little Willoughby so much as caught a whiff of puriri she would keel over and die.

Willoughby the chinchilla with her former owner (Photo: Esther White)

This fondness many of us have for an animal species that shouldn’t be here at all is the massive contradiction at the heart of the relationship between tāngata and rīroi. Rodents have caused widespread destruction in Aotearoa just as they did in Europe during the Middle Ages. But this has occurred simultaneously with centuries of peaceful, productive, even loving coexistence.

So as the age of rodentia in New Zealand draws to a close, we should look back and remember the times we have shared, good and bad.

1280 – The first of New Zealand’s documented wild rodent species, the kiore is brought to New Zealand by Polynesian settlers. There are used as a source of meat and pelts. Kiore pose a threat to native flora and fauna but this is negligible compared to the carnage that will follow.

Two kiore, NZ native rats, on Little Barrier Island. Photo: teara.govt.nz

1772 – While he is in the process of claiming the largest ocean on the planet for the British Empire (despite it already being widely discovered, documented and settled), Captain James Cook logs the first sighting of the Waitoreke. This cryptid is described as a cross between a beaver (a rodent) and an otter (not a rodent). The possible existence of this elusive creature is notable as it would give New Zealand a native land mammal that isn’t a bat. Sightings of the Waitoreke continue throughout the 19th and 20th centuries.

Late 1700s – The second, and largest, documented wild rodent, the Norway rat is accidentally and carelessly introduced by early Pākehā settlers. They pose a much more direct threat to native birds than kiore and have none of the utilitarian value.

1824 – The first house mouse arrives in New Zealand (via Australia obviously) when a ship runs into Ruapuke Island. Its distant descendants will become the bane of your Aro Valley flat.

This little fucker

Late 1800s – The final member of the big four introduced wild rodents, the ship rat, is brought to New Zealand. It quickly displaces many of the larger Norway rats to become lord of its fellow introduced subjects, a rat king if you will.

The 20th century – A quiet hundred years in rodent news. The population of introduced rodents explodes along with their human cohabitants. People start keeping rodents as pets. More people see the Waitoreke.

February 2015 – Rodent sweethearts Hansel and Petal are married in a modest ceremony at Wendelton Guinea Pig Village in Richmond, Nelson.

May 2017 – Six year-old Taumaihiroa Tawhai-Porter pens a letter to the Ministry of Primary Industries in both te reo and English asking for a hamster for her birthday. The ministry responds by reaffirming its anti-rodent stance, pledging to keep Aotearoa hamster-free and denying the little girl her birthday wish.

June 2017 – While in Waiuku for my granddad’s 90th, I notice that the guests sharing the motel with my family have a horse float despite being conspicuously horseless. Upon closer inspection, I realise that the float is full of guinea pigs that have been brought up from the South Island for the National Cavy (wanky word for guinea pig) Convention. We head along to the Waiuku College auditorium where the ceremony is taking place and are greeted by the most bizarre sight. A podium is set up at the front of the room where the cavies are placed and judged while they remain absolutely motionless. In the interim, the other contestants use all manner of hairdressing equipment to groom their cavies. One of them is styled to look like Donald Trump. It is a lot to deal with.

October 2018 – The national rodent biomass skyrockets when proud capybara parents Pepe and Iapa welcome an ‘unusual’ number of pups at Wellington Zoo. Thankfully, they manage to sustain a healthy sex-life post-childbirth.

Wellington capybara Iapa with one of her cute-as Cerpyboodles. Credit: Wellington Zoo.

May 2019 – Shit goes down on the ‘Chinchillas of New Zealand’ Facebook group. Aside from the occasional thread containing photos of chinchillas auto-fellating, the group is usually relatively benign. This changes when a member accuses another of mistreating their chins and receives a strongly-worded DM from someone who accuses them of causing “a bunch of unwanted drama”. The OP posts a screenshot of the DMs claiming that “New Zealand has such a disgusting abundance of bullies.” The stakes have never been higher in the New Zealand rodent community.

June 2019 – Sensing change in the air, the rodent forces attempt to stage one last stand. On one side of the skirmish is the human inhabitants of the Auckland suburb of Titirangi. On the other, a guerrilla force of rats the size of cats. Despite a valiant effort from the furry monstrosities, they do little to disrupt the road towards Predator Free 2050.

2050 – Maps of New Zealand need to be redrawn to account for the rising sea levels. The boiling ocean makes many coastal areas unliveable. Antibiotic-resistant bacteria have ravaged much of the population. God emperor Peter Thiel declares the last of the rodents are “lost in time, like tears in the rain”. He does not see any irony in the fact that he is still here.

As New Zealand’s birds hope to re-inherit the land that has been rightfully theirs since their dinosaur ancestors left, we should take a moment to thank the defeated upstarts. Sure rodents might have fucked things up real bad here, but their cuteness is undeniable.

Keep going!
Nick Atkinson takes a plunge into a nameless Alpine lake. Photo: Finn Scholes
Nick Atkinson takes a plunge into a nameless Alpine lake. Photo: Finn Scholes

SocietyAugust 3, 2019

Why I love winter swims

Nick Atkinson takes a plunge into a nameless Alpine lake. Photo: Finn Scholes
Nick Atkinson takes a plunge into a nameless Alpine lake. Photo: Finn Scholes

Want to feel better and sharper, and get a better night’s sleep? Nick Atkinson has just the thing, and it’s very cold and wet

Winton’s caught a couple of great looking snapper. He’s kayaked to Te Kākāwhakaara/Watchman Island and I’m about to meet him after swimming out from one of the ratty little Herne Bay beaches. “You’re very hardy,” he says, as I haul up panting on the sandstone plinth of this tiny, uninhabited sugar-cube of an island. I compliment him heartily on his excellent pair of fish. One of his snapper looks around 40cm long. He’s happy too. We both frown while speculating about fish behaviour throughout a typical winter. It’s a friendly sunlit exchange, encouraged by the knowledge that this particular conversation will be brief. We introduce ourselves formally at the end of our chat. Winton remarks on my refrigerated hands as we shake on it. I dive in for the swim home. My face is especially cold. It seems to be the part of my body that cools quickest and takes longest to thaw afterwards.

I’ve heard regular swimming in chilly water promotes blubber growth, which isn’t going to sell readers on the idea of leaping into our waterways during our shortest days. Yet winter is a wonderful season for swimming in and around Auckland. The low sun burnishes the edges of our fair harbour. On calmer days the sea becomes limpid. The boosters playing dance music on Bluetooth speakers have migrated away from the coast leaving the popular spots peaceful. Out west the usually hell-fire hot sand becomes cool and silky on the toes. Sometimes after rain at this time of year the more remote beaches are completely free of footprints.

Obviously, the water is colder, but this quickens the pulse. The shock of freezing brine hitting your muzzle makes you feel wonderfully alive. Much has been written about immersion in cold water stimulating your metabolism, increasing your ability to burn sugars. The cold stimulates your lymph nodes, boosts the ability of your immune system to fight off infection (but make sure you warm up as fast as you can until you blush with that first mist of perspiration). Cold water swimming also helps you manage stress as the problem of the endless freezing ocean enveloping you dissolve your various issues for an exquisite moment.

By its very nature jumping into the sea during winter is extremely effective at focusing your attention on the present, which helps manage depression and anxiety. While the health benefits of a bracing dip are well chronicled, one effect stands out above all others in my experience – I get an astonishingly good sleep the night after a winter plunge. I’m out like a light and barely tug at the sheets till morning. It’s a generous reward for a few minutes gambolling and when compared to an alpine lake, you’ll find Waitemata Harbour in August balmy at around 15 degrees celsius. If you received a beer of that temperature you’d call it warm!

One winter swim I cherish above all others features that little island you can see off Herne Bay while driving over the Harbour Bridge. I’ve found it’s best to embark from the beach at the end of Wallace Street named Home Bay. There’s no freshwater shower, which is a mark against this otherwise excellent spot with steps leading directly down to the high water mark. Almost 700 meters away, Te Kākāwhakaara/Watchman Island defies the currents. Its flat summit is covered in short grass which seems, along with three scraggy pohutukawas, to be the only thing holding this squat lump together. Black back gulls rear a pair of chicks here each spring. Oyster catchers will usually hatch a clutch of speckled eggs, but the big powerful black backs deal to the chicks pretty smartly.

This winter I’m attempting to swim to the island and back every week without a wetsuit. I’ve been overjoyed to manage the swim with some regularity during July for the first time in my life, leaving August as the only month I haven’t yet managed it. It’s a swim I dread. The return trip takes about 40 minutes as the tidal currents lengthen the challenge somewhat. You get a chance to get your breath back once aboard the island and even though you’re colder and you’ve used up a good deal of energy, the leg home always seems easier than the swim out.

It’s not an expedition I’d recommend to the novice, but in summer anyone with a little fitness can complete the round trip, provided you work the tides. If you’re considering the mission to the island. make sure you’re well hydrated. You need to take on a good deal of water before stretching those calf muscles to prevent cramp, which is probably the most serious risk you face swimming in cold water. I find it easier on an empty stomach.

Many of my closest friends believe I represent the lunatic fringe when it comes to swimming in cold water without a wetsuit and while I’d encourage anyone to experience the zing of icy sea on their skin, it’s a personal preference. A wetsuit greatly improves buoyancy while enhancing your ability to endure the cold. Basically it gives you a great safety margin. I’d avoid swimming while intoxicated and you must be aware of the impact the weather and the tides have on a given swimming destination. It’s also a good rule of thumb to avoid swimming in and around Auckland within 24 hours of heavy rain. I sometimes swim while it’s pouring down and I’ve never known any ill effects, but most Aucklanders will be familiar with the sometimes pungent limitations of our stormwater drainage system.

If a musician of middling fitness like me can make it to Te Kākāwhakaara/Watchman Island without a wetsuit then anyone can safely enjoy an exhilarating plunge into our harbour purified by salt and cold. Fellow beach-goers will look upon you with awe. You’ll make new wayfaring friends as you emerge from the water. They’ll want to trade pleasantries and compliments as if you were a virtuoso descending from the stage. Fame and glory await the winter swimmer on a sunny day, but when the clouds congeal you plow a lonely furrow. Then the fruits of your endeavour grow anonymously on the branches of hardy virtue. My mantra: you never regret a swim!

Auckland’s top 5 winter swimming spots

Herne Bay

I’m talking specifically about the surprisingly generous beach at the bottom of Herne Bay Road. There are toilets and a freshwater shower here, but its main attraction is thanks to a generous 1,500 cubic metre dose of sand, barged in from the seabed off glittering Parkari Beach. Doubters like myself assumed this coastal top-up would be washed away during the next big cyclone, but 10 years later you can still find Pakari sized scallop shells at Herne Bay and the sand is still there. This beach is tidal and the best time to arrive is an hour before high tide on a calm day as the Pacific Ocean blooms into the upper reaches of the harbour. While the city-end of the beach holds the evening sun longest, beware of the slippery papa rock beneath the surface here. I’ve witnessed grisly scenes as enthusiastic graphic designers dive in nearly losing their snouts on the sharp pacific oysters that have colonised the slippery shelves at that end of the beach. The middle of the bay is a beaut for entering the water with plenty of that nice Pakari sand to tread on.

Thorne Bay

In summer you’ll be lucky to find a park on Minnehaha Road, but it’s a breeze in winter. As you stroll down this idyllic lane you can momentarily bathe your eardrums in the serene silence of wealth while gazing curiously down the driveways of the exceptionally rich. Drug deals orchestrated by Mr Asia went down here, but you forget all this as a staggering vista of the Hauraki Gulf opens up at the bottom on the street. On a clear day, Aotea/Great Barrier Island can be seen almost 90 kilometres away. Exceptionally high spring tides can wash over the path to Thorne Bay, but most of the time it’s a short trot to the beach.

I’ve swum with dolphins here and I’ve seen orca feeding close into the rocks. This beach gets diabolically busy in January and February, but in winter the lava flows from Lake Pupuke hold the heat and the sun for much longer than the steep little beach with its coarse shelly sand. While this almost north-facing spot is a diamond at high tide (you can almost dive in from the beach) it can also be a jewel at around half tide as a network of freshwater springs become exposed. As the tide drops more and more of these musical cascades are unveiled pouring fresh water into the sea via lava fissures connected to Lake Pupuke that were formed up to 150,000 years ago. They’re great for a rinse off after your dip.

Ti Point wharf

This idyllic and functional wharf catches the evening winter sun and it’s handy to get to the excellent Leigh Sawmill Cafe where you can warm up afterwards if you’re in the area Thursday through Sunday (winter hours). I used to adore Matheson Bay just down the hill from Leigh township, but this otherwise lovely spot is blighted by the entitled boomers who live above this sheltered crescent of sand. Beware of these norms who cruise the beach before dusk moving folks on while quoting improvised bylaws.

Back at Ti Point an incoming tide brings in phenomenally clear water directly from the Pacific Ocean parked, conveniently, outside the harbour entrance. Jumping from a wharf is a superb way to counter those ums-and-ahs that sometimes afflict the winter swimmer, and there are generous albeit slippery stairs and a good boat ramp to help you clamber out again. Turn right before Leigh down the road that leads to the reptile park. Keep going another kilometre or so and you’re there.

O’Neill Beach

This bay is a grand flooded volcanic caldera that many visit walking north over a dune from Te Henga. There’s a wonderfully scenic alternative to that route which you’ll find if you make a hard right immediately after the one way bridge well before you get to the main car park. A firm sandy drive leads to a parking area where “Bridge Washed Away” signs deter most walkers. This little river can become impassable in a deluge, but the ford is more than manageable in most conditions and it’s usually only ankle deep. Lord only knows when the bridge will be replaced.

O’Neill beach in winter. Photo: Nick Atkinson

The track to O’Neill Beach is one of the most beautiful legs of the impossibly scenic Hillary Trail. It takes about 25 minutes to sidle up though the pohutukawa and manuka forest on a well-formed track and the views of Te Henga and O’Neill Beach on the way are spellbinding. O’Neill Beach has an unfair reputation as being one of the most dangerous of Auckland’s West Coast beaches. It’s certainly scary at high tide when it’s rough, but once the tide falls you can play and gambol in the shallows to your heart’s content. This is an unpatrolled beach at all times of the year – make of that what you will. It’s a true treasure less than an hour from Tāmaki Makaurau and one of the best beaches anywhere in the world.

Sloane’s Beach

Sloane’s is the colloquial name of the tiny piece of sand at the bottom of Marine Parade Reserve. This intimate spot wedged between the spacious houses occupying Herne Bay’s front row holds the evening sun longer than any of the six Herne Bay beaches. There’s a hose for a freshwater rinse off and even in summer, you’ll often be the only one there. I rate the Herne Bay beaches over the long stretch of sand at Point Chevalier because they provide a little shelter from the sou’west wind which hits Point Chev right in the chops. The water’s a little deeper too, meaning you have an ever so slightly longer window to swim either side of high-tide. I concede that for sunsets Point Chev is supreme and when the wind is in the east it’s also a great option.

 

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