Pro-life activist Lynn Jackson, with the group Bound for Life, protests in front of the U.S. Supreme Court November 30, 2005 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images)
Pro-life activist Lynn Jackson, with the group Bound for Life, protests in front of the U.S. Supreme Court November 30, 2005 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images)

SocietyMay 26, 2019

10 things Kiwi men can do in the wake of Alabama’s abortion ban

Guest writer
Pro-life activist Lynn Jackson, with the group Bound for Life, protests in front of the U.S. Supreme Court November 30, 2005 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images)
Pro-life activist Lynn Jackson, with the group Bound for Life, protests in front of the U.S. Supreme Court November 30, 2005 in Washington, DC. (Photo by Win McNamee/Getty Images)

Men need to put aside their discomfort and support New Zealand women in the wake of Alabama’s abortion ban, writes Zoe Deans. 

Kiwi bloke stoicism hasn’t really equipped anyone to deal with outpourings of pain. And right now, it’s all around. Your friends, your wife, your workmates, your sister – we’re shocked, scared, furious, hurt and bewildered by Alabama’s horrifying new laws that effectively ban abortion.

The recent ruling in Alabama – and similar ones in Ohio, Missouri, and Georgia – are terrifying reminders of just how fragile our right to bodily autonomy is. And though it’s far away, it hits close to home. Here in Aotearoa, abortion can only be accessed legally if the pregnant person has sign-off from two doctors. Getting an abortion in New Zealand remains a palaver of appointments and approval-seeking which, contrary to what Alfred Ngaro says, many women find stressful, intimidating and exhausting.

There’s been an eerie silence in the conversation, though. Men have been conspicuously quiet about the abortion ban. I get it: it’s hard to know what to do. The men I talked to said that they found it difficult to know what to say about such an emotive issue, or feared that speaking out about the abortion bans might bring up painful emotions. Some weren’t sure it was their place to say anything at all.

Beneath their top-level discomfort, these men had a deep desire to be better at empathising with and supporting women in the wake of Alabama’s abortion ban. It’s critical that they do. The right to choose when and how we have kids affects all of us, and access to family planning is crucial in affording women dignity and control over their lives.

What you do now matters. Not only for the women in your life but for the movement for reproductive rights everywhere. This is your fight too.

My dudes, you need to put aside your discomfort and take action. Here’s how.

1) Take responsibility in the bedroom

This one goes without saying, but it takes two people to conceive. Do your part by ensuring you not only carry condoms (and check the expiry dates), but you offer to use them as a default. Respect women’s birth control choices and never pressure women to have unprotected sex or to change their contraception method for you – no whining, pleading, rolling eyes or sulking. Offer to help pay for your partner’s contraception. Some of the most reliable long-term options still aren’t publicly funded and can carry a hefty price. If you’re done having kids or just don’t want them, consider a vasectomy.

2) Listen to and share women’s lived experiences

Listen to, read or watch women’s lived experiences of seeking abortions in Aotearoa. Offer support to loved ones who have had an abortion and might be feeling especially hit by the news from Alabama. Ask what they need and listen without offering solutions, unless those are asked for. The voices of the people most impacted by abortion bans must remain at the core of this conversation. Re-share videos and articles by women and advocacy groups on social media.

3) Speak out about your own experiences with abortion

Almost a third of women in New Zealand will have an abortion in their lifetime. A lot of men have already supported partners, friends or family members through abortion. It can be distressing, difficult and sad, but it can also afford you and your loved ones the chance to choose when you start a family. It’s important to be vocal about it (with consent and prior discussion with the person who had the abortion).

4) Educate yourself about anatomy

One of the most shocking things to come out of this whole Alabama debacle is the sheer willful ignorance legislators have shown about women’s bodies. This is not some harmless bumbling, it’s actively dangerous. It leads to misconceptions (not a pun), like the idea that a woman’s body can “shut the whole thing down” and not get pregnant during rape, therefore justifying abortion bans. Revisit the heady days of third form health class and read about how uteruses work (just don’t be the guy who tried to mansplain vulvas to a gynaecologist).

5) Change New Zealand’s abortion laws

Abortion in New Zealand is still in the Crimes Act 1961, but it doesn’t have to be. We can change the laws, and it’s a good time to act. Parliament is currently considering recommendations from the Law Commission on legalising abortion. Sign a petition (or two), email your local MP, phone your representative and let them know this is an issue for you. Meet with an MP and tell them your story. Publicly call out anti-abortion politicians – they need to know their views aren’t tolerated and they don’t have a platform. Make sure you know the parties’ policies on abortion and vote accordingly.

6) Give practical support

If someone in your life is having an abortion, ask how you can support her. Offer to drive her to and from her appointments, cook her dinner, look after her kids, run errands, or stay with her after the procedure if she needs help or hugs.

7) Put your money where your mouth is
If you played a part in the conception, pay for part or all of the abortion. Remember that abortions can cost women in other ways: it’s not just the price of the procedure, but the time off work, extra childcare, fuel money and doctor’s fees.

Handmaid’s protestors outside Parliament. Photo: Emily Writes.

8) If you’re an employer or manager, be sensitive around any loss of pregnancy

There is currently a bill before Parliament that would give women who have experienced miscarriage access to bereavement leave, but it’s been pointed out that this could easily be changed to encompass any other loss of pregnancy. With New Zealand’s laws requiring women to make multiple appointments to fulfil the requirements to access an abortion, many women require time off work. That’s not to mention the emotional and physical recovery time needed. Unless they have understanding employers, women can be forced to take leave without pay or even lose their jobs. Don’t interrogate your staff, but if they do trust you to speak about their situation, give options for extra leave and support.

9) Donate to the cause

Stump up some cash for the hardworking organisations that champion reproductive rights in Aotearoa. ALRANZ (Abortion Law Reform Aotearoa New Zealand) advocate tirelessly for better access to abortion. Family Planning (the place you pocketed free condoms from during high school) provides advice and support to women seeking contraception and abortions. Donations allow them to continue their important work.

More Reading

10) Talk to your mates about it

Men need to be speaking to other men about issues that affect women’s bodies. It’s not enough for women to be the only messengers. As long as the conversation remains solely the domain of people with uteruses, reproductive rights will always be abstract nice-to-haves in the minds of people without uteruses.

Author’s note: This piece discusses women seeking abortion, but we recognise that it’s not only women that have uteruses and it’s not only women that seek abortions. Trans and non-binary people require reproductive rights. If you’re a cis man and you want to be a great ally, support LGBTQI organisations too.

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One of these pictures from the Hotel Bed Jumping instagram is not like the others
One of these pictures from the Hotel Bed Jumping instagram is not like the others

SocietyMay 26, 2019

The mysterious Instagram influencers offering cash for hotel bed jumping videos

Contributing writer
One of these pictures from the Hotel Bed Jumping instagram is not like the others
One of these pictures from the Hotel Bed Jumping instagram is not like the others

David Farrier dives deep into the Hotel Bed Jumping Community on Instagram and is quickly told: ‘Should you pursue with your article and publish it we will be taking action’. He chose to pursue the article.

I’m a big fan of Instagram, and an even bigger fan of what Instagram influencers are getting up to. And recently what they’ve been getting up to is jumping on hotel beds.

It’s happening in Dubai, it’s happening in America, and it’s happening here. New Zealand’s own Eden Coleman, who has over 50,000 followers, took part earlier this year. “A BIG thanks to @hotelbedjumping_community, so happy I won your comp!” she wrote on April 30. “It feels great to be involved with a charity who have partnered with #jumpforkids which featured on @theellenshow!”

I was very aware that “Hotel Bed Jumping” was a weird annoying internet thing a decade ago, but had never heard of the Hotel Bed Jumping Community, a real thing that exists on Instagram in 2019.

They boast around 26,000 followers, billing themselves on Instagram as a “Travel Agency”. They also claim to donate mattresses to homeless children’s shelters.

The thing is, the page is tonally quite weird – a combination of stock hotel room photos and stock models….

… as well as photos of “influencers” who have submitted photos:

And amongst all that, a variety of sick-looking kid stock photos:

The captions under the sick kid photos serve as a reminder that the Hotel Bed Jumping Community is some kind of charity. “We’re extremely proud to be a part of this amazing cause and helping homeless kids in desperate need of a shelter,” they write.

Another caption reads “We have been providing FREE hotel rooms to followers to capture content to put towards the #jumpforkids campaign”.

By this point, I suspected something fishy was going on with this account. Because in my experience when you combine stock photos, charities, and influencers in hotel rooms, something weird is usually going on.

Now the #jumpforkids campaign is a real thing, an initiative set up by Puffy Beds which does have the high distinction of having appeared on Ellen. According to their website and this tweet, for every 100 social media posts tagged with #jumpforkids, Puffy will donate a mattress to a homeless shelter.

Curious, I began talking with some influencers contacted by @hotelbedjumping_community to see what Hotel Bed Jumping’s pitch was. It went something like this:

Nowhere does Tanya from TPT Marketing mention the mattress company they are collaborating with: I only found out by looking into the #jumpforkids hashtag which links up with the initiative by Puffy Beds. So I asked Puffy Beds if there was any kind of collaboration going on. There wasn’t.

Hotel Bed Jumping Community also talks a lot about “teaming up” with hotels, including Auckland’s Mercure:

I reached out to the Mercure, who told me, “There wasn’t a formal agreement. We were asked by Hotel Bed Jumping if we wanted to give away rooms as part of a competition, which they run regularly on their account and we offered two room nights.”

“We provided the room night vouchers but didn’t have any other involvement in the running of the competition. This was not a collab.”

So, what are the Hotel Bed Jumping Community up to? Who are they? Where are they? Their first post was made way back in 2015, so they’ve been going for a while.

Mainly, I was curious about their endgame. On their account, they claim to have given away 48 mattresses which would mean they’d have had to generate 4,800 #jumpforkids hashtags. With only 627 posts, it seems unlikely they would’ve featured the 4,800 hashtags needed.

Despite being billed as a “travel agency”, they also seem to like raising money. There is currently a GoFundMe page, run by a Tanya Wilkinson who has made zero donations and started zero campaigns (besides this one):

So far it has raised zero dollars. According to their Instagram saved stories, someone did make a payment using PayPal:

At this point, I’d tried emailing and DMing Hotel Bed Jumping but hadn’t gotten a reply. So I decided to leave a comment on their Instagram and they actually got in touch pretty quickly. Apparently, my email and DMs hadn’t gotten through. Finally, I could ask them some questions directly.

“I’m Gemma from TPT Marketing,” they replied. “Tanya is our marketing director”. Our conversation was meandering and a little frustrating, but I did find out that TPT apparently stood for “The Premier Team”.

“We are a small marketing company based out of Australia.” There was no trace of them on any Australian Business register.

I told Gemma I was trying to establish if they were real or not, so I asked if I could get her surname or even just a website. Anything to help prove this was a real thing. I was unsuccessful. “For legal reasons and privacy constraints within our conditions of employment we will not be offering any surnames,” Gemma said.

“We are not interested in engaging in any form of media engagement.” I asked them about their Puffy Beds relationship. “We are not currently working with Puffy Mattresses and haven’t for roughly 24 months.”

“Since then a locally family-owned mattress company has come on board and has offered to donate a mattress to kids in need for the content we capture. They donated 30 initially and the other 18 have been donated through the content we’ve captured.”

I asked for the name of the company. I just wanted one fact I could verify as true. “We would need to attain their consent,” Gemma replied. I asked about the GoFundMe and where the money was going (assuming any was raised).

“We can tell you who we intend on donating to, when the time comes.” Foiled again!

I reached out to many of the influencers on Instagram who’d taken part and was eventually provided with a typical recruitment email sent out to a participant. It provided good insight into the content “TPT Marketing” wanted:

“What we are looking for is around 10-15 minutes of bed jumping footage to help us with our youtube channel and its launch… it doesn’t have to be one big video it can be broken down into 1-2 minute videos x10 if this is easier, or perhaps just leave the camera running for 30 minutes.

“For the footage we also request a few different outfits… eg gym gear with shoes on, or just some casual outfits… shirts/jean, cocktail dress, whatever you feel comfortable in.

“The camera angle – we need the whole bed/bed base fully visible along with the person jumping, we also ask there is little to no background music but the footage must contain sound and be unedited, besides that, your free to jump up and down, bellyflop, flip and seat-drop as much as you like.

“As mentioned, feel free to get girlfriends/colleagues involved”.

One of the influencers was thinking what I was thinking. Entirely unconfirmed, but just a sneaking suspicion: “I think it’s most likely a fetish disguised as a charity,” one participant wrote to me on Instagram. “They offered me money for videos”, they added, before emailing me a screenshotted DM:

I asked Gemma at TPT marketing if they had ever offered to pay models for content. “We have never offered any money exchanges in regards to capturing content”.

“If we see any articles on your blog that are in a negative view or a factually incorrect and are based on assumptions or opinions but are published we will be acting accordingly.”

Read more of David Farrier’s investigations of strange internet phenomena

Hotel Bed Jumping is a strange world. Unverifiable names, supposed competitions, and ultimately a desire to gather as much footage as possible of a sort-of-innocent-but-is-it-something-else activity.

There is no giant scandal to be found here. No-one is getting hurt. What we have is a really good example of how strange influencer culture has become.

I mean, you have a bunch of influencers that jump at the phrase “free hotel room” and “charity”.  Then you have hotel chains happy to give away rooms to a “Travel Agency” that appears to be nothing more than an Instagram account with 26,000 followers.

Hypothetically, if I was someone who wanted footage of women jumping on beds, I’d probably do exactly what TPT Marketing has done. And suddenly I’d be getting free hotel rooms to offer to ‘influencers’, in exchange for them filming themselves and sending me the footage. And I’d be doing all this in plain sight because the social media influencer scene is so cooked. No one would even blink an eye.

I checked my DMs again, and there were some new ones from @hotelbedjumping_community. They said they were aware I’d been making inquiries and were upset I’d voiced my suspicions to participants. “We’ll be obtaining this information in its hard copy and be passing onto the relevant parties if need be.

“Should you pursue with your article and publish it we will be taking action.”

Quite a strong reaction from an Instagram account that really loves jumping on hotel beds.

Society