Daddy’s arrived, and he’s trying to figure out a way to leave the little shits at home.
At the National Party’s annual conference over the weekend, there was only one question at the forefront: who’s your daddy? Between the octogenarian who says he’s there for you and the Libertarian who tells you to be there for yourself, the nation needs a strong fiscal father figure. And that man’s name, the National Party will have you know, is Christopher Luxon.
He’s not the kind of dad who spots you a tenner when rent is due. He’s one that reminds you that if you’d saved, you wouldn’t be in this position at all. He believes in backing you to back yourself. He’s also not one for a lavish conference when all can be said and done over tiny tasters and a short speech.
For a 90th anniversary event, National’s annual conference was a relatively lowkey affair. Maybe you could blame it on the setting: the Lower Hutt Convention Centre, on a particularly windy weekend. Or the little fanfare, with a lack of party memorabilia to wear or flags to fly. Or the anniversary bash on Saturday night, which left a few Young Nats looking weary-eyed by Sunday morning. Anyway, for an election year conference, it felt surprisingly subdued.
A severely mojo-less Simeon Brown took the stage as the party’s campaign chair to set out the election vision. But what Brown lacks in charisma he makes up for in strong words, telling the few hundred-strong crowd that a vote for Act and NZ First would do nothing to help the National Party. “You just can’t trust them,” said Brown of NZ First, the party he’s currently in a coalition with and will likely need if his own party wants to get into power again.
A National government is like a working family, Brown explained. You’ve got Mum and Dad getting up early to make sure all the bills are paid and their kids are out the door, even when the children are warring with each other. “You know who those two kids are,” Brown said. “With Mum and Dad in the middle, finding the time in all the noise to get on and get the job done.”
The problem with families, as Brown forgot to point out, is that it’s also often hard to get rid of each other. Post-budget polls have kept National between 29% and 30%, and NZ First on 12% – a reminder that, despite the infighting, they still need to live under one roof. Brown and National just need to break their co-dependence by convincing voters that Peters can be adopted by Labour.
And to win over the public at large, the party is embracing a more paternalistic approach than it usually would. A raft of Kiwisaver changes were announced that the party announced will campaign on, l including making the scheme compulsory for all working New Zealanders from July 2028, with progressive increases in the default contributions. The party also wants to enrol every newborn from 2027, provide a government-paid parental leave contribution and make employer contributions compulsory for workers over 65.
The catch is that the policy is similar to one announced by Peters last month, but with the word “compulsory” and an extra $500 tacked on top. Peters has told Stuff that “it must be slightly embarrassing to first criticise NZ First then have to copy our policies”. On the other side of the coalition, Act Party leader David Seymour told The Post the changes are “exactly the kind of feel good, end bad policy Act exists to hold the line on.”
It’s also something the National Party once held the line on. Former prime minister Jenny Shipley, who was present at the ceremony, campaigned hard against a universal retirement scheme in the 1990s. She declined to comment on the policy. It was also a National government (Key in 2015) that got rid of the previously available $1,000 Kiwisaver kickstart in the first place.
Amidst the chaos, there was a moment today to remind the National Party why they formed 90 years ago, and why the coalition makes sense together: a shared hatred of socialists. While National had its policy announcement in Wellington, the Green Party put on the table a number of tax reforms, including a 33% inheritance tax on assets or gifts over $1m (excluding the family home, farm, or Māori land transfer).
It was “crazy,” said Luxon. It could create a “culture that opposes success”, said Seymour. And when Peters snaps out of his rage, he’ll probably be saying something something shallow self-obsessed Marxist. Nothing brings family together like a shared enemy.
Before the country re-elects National, how can it be sure it can deliver the changes it’s promising while keeping the kids in control? If Brown is warning his own party members not to trust NZ First, does that mean Luxon also doesn’t trust his own coalition partner – NZ First, specifically?
“I’ve enjoyed working with them, actually,” Luxon told reporters at a press stand-up following his speech.
But do you trust Peters, at the end of the day?
“I’ve trusted him in government, absolutely,” Luxon replied.
OK, sure. So what’s Luxon’s vibe check?
“Very good,” he replied. “It’s really good.”
The National Party may have spent the weekend distancing itself from its coalition partners, but Monday’s cabinet meeting might remind Dad that he can’t get rid of the kids just like that. Family life under MMP means learning the hard lesson that sharing is caring.
