The prime minister still thinks he’s running a company. But we can work with that.
Christopher Luxon has been struggling almost since the day he became prime minister. Most of politics is about communicating with potential voters and he all-too-often seems uniquely unsuited to the task. The people want him to speak in a language alien to him. “Big rocks,” he says, over the increasingly agonised screams of his media advisors. “Delivery gates,” he declares as his preferred prime minister numbers drop precariously. “I don’t know how to be any clearer guys,” he complains as reporters plead with him to articulate a position on the Iran war.
It can seem like, as John Gray once wrote, the people are from Mars and the prime minister is from Venus. Why? On Monday, Luxon let slip a big clue on the potential root of his issues. “My job is the CEO,” he said, in response to a question from TVNZ Breakfast presenter Tova O’Brien on why he was letting his ministers front the government’s public communications on the fuel crisis. “Your job is the prime minister,” O’Brien calmly explained. “Ah, yeah it is,” Luxon replied. But her words didn’t seem to sink in. The prime minister ploughed on in a distinctly CEO-ish fashion. “My job is to make sure I’ve got my team on the right assignments at the right time.”
The interview is illuminating. Language isn’t Luxon’s issue; it’s environment. The prime minister is still labouring under the assumption he’s the chief executive of a company, most likely an airline. The confusion seeps through everything he does. Today, for instance, he’s carrying out a cabinet reshuffle. But how is he going to manage that given the weird criss-crossing job titles and blurry power dynamics that complicate politics? He’d be far more comfortable executing the manoeuvre if it was a restructure at a company with much more clearly delineated roles and functions. For that, he needs an organisational chart. Thankfully The Spinoff is here to help.
Government NZ organisational chart
CEO: Christopher Luxon
This much is clear: Luxon is the chief executive of the powerful state-owned company Government NZ.
Board chair: Winston Peters
Chief executives aren’t the final arbiters of decisionmaking in a company. They ultimately answer to the board, which is tasked with making calls on major financial and strategic moves, along with whether to hire or fire the CEO.
NZ First leader Winston Peters is clearly Government NZ’s board chair. He made the initial call to hire the company’s CEO and maintains a key oversight role. The chief executive might think, for instance, that he can institute a foreign buyers’ tax to pay for his tax cuts. Think again, sunshine. That’ll need sign-off and a few structural changes. He might want to take credit for striking a deal with a fellow company. Should have looped in the chair, you half-acre soy boy.
Understanding one’s subordination to the chair can help a CEO avoid awkward conflicts.
Chief financial officer, board member: David Seymour
Synergy and organisational alignment are important, but every good CEO knows you can’t move the big rocks without money. Enter David Seymour. Together with his direct reports in the Act party, he makes big calls on what Government NZ can or can’t afford. Notably, he decided the company wouldn’t have been able to deliver its budget for the 2025/26 financial year without significant cuts to its investment in pay equity for women. Though some commentators argued the company’s strategic withdrawal from those commitments amounted to it acting like a “cunt”, Seymour insisted it saved the company’s books ahead of the vital pre-election financial quarter.
Seymour’s unusual role as both CFO and board member means he has, in his own words, “disproportionate influence” in the company. For instance, he recently vetoed its COO’s efforts to allow apartments near central Auckland, saying it would upset key stakeholders in Remuera.
Chief operations officer: Chris Bishop
This one should be obvious. As things stand, Bishop is responsible for roughly 70% of Government NZ’s operations, but that could be worth checking on in a few hours.
Accounts manager: Nicola Willis
Finance minister Nicola Willis oversees the day-to-day running of Government NZ’s books, but ultimately the biggest decisions need consensus from others within the organisation’s C-suite.
Head of PR: Nancy Lu
Every organisation needs someone who’ll spruik its product with the passion and full-throated intensity of Suzanne Paul saying “thousands of luminous spheres”. Lu showed she had what it takes when she delivered a heartfelt ode to Luxon’s umbrella-holding abilities back in February. “That’s leadership. Kind. Grounded. Energetic. Action-oriented. My leader,” Lu said.
She only made one mistake, signing off her missive “our Prime Minister” rather than “our CEO”.
President, sales and marketing: Rima Nakhle
IT manager: Shane Jones
NZ First’s deputy leader was an early advocate for government investment in paid video streaming, even going so far as to use his ministerial credit card to order porn to his hotel room. He’s now a vocal advocate for cutting-edge technologies including generating energy from coal.
Deputy IT manager: Whoever is behind the National party X account.
This anonymous mastermind has shown a natural aptitude for new tech, even creating a terrifying AI-generated blue gimp to threaten jobless teens.
Head of legal: Penny Simmonds
Simmonds has experience navigating tricky legal situations and should be well-suited to her role. She will have support and oversight from Peters, who’s at home in court proceedings.
Head of events: Louise Upston
Upston has managed to perform the formerly impossible feat of attracting Robbie Williams to New Zealand at the cost of only millions of dollars to Government NZ. As head of events, she may be able to pull off more coups. Perhaps a concert by Six60 or even The Jordan Luck Band?
HR manager: Judith Collins
Judith Collins stepped into a transitional HR role after Luxon replaced her as CEO, giving sage advice to team members on matters such as whether it’s good to be leader of the National party. The answer, as it turns out, is no, and that’s something Luxon appears to be learning every day.
Shortly after adopting her mentoring role, Collins retired. A replacement will be needed soon. Waimakariri MP Matt Doocey is a qualified counsellor and at least going by the latest polling, that may come in handy after November 7.
